If you could sign any Executive Orders??

Gerry Canning said:
Purple , You might be right, so maybe employers might need a massive investment in training V hoping the skilled labour exists.
That would be a win - win.
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Who is going to pay for the training?
The problem is that there is a shortage of people with the appropriate training and qualifications leaving schools/colleges. Few employers in the SME sector have the resources to train people to that level. We know that not enough kids do STEM subjects in schools. Thankfully we have a good flow of people from Eastern Europe coming here as their training in engineering and related subjects is vastly superior to ours.
 
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I would establish RTE GAA where GAA fans could indulge themselves 24/7. For the rest of us I would ban all GAA coverage on RTEs 1 & 2.

I would deport Joe Duffy back to Ballyfermot. And I'd send Marty Morrissey and Jo Brolly back to where they came from as well.

Oh, and I would give control of the Blood Transfusion Service to the Jehovvah's Witnesses.
 
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Duke of Marmalade said:
I would establish RTE GAA where GAA fans could indulge themselves 24/7. For the rest of us I would ban all GAA coverage on RTEs 1 & 2.

I would deport Joe Duffy back to Ballyfermot. And I'd send Marty Morrissey and Jo Brolly back to where they came from as well.

Oh, and I would give control of the Blood Transfusion Service to the Jehovvah's Witnesses.
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I'd also remove all the Irish Language requirements from RTE or close TG4.
I object to the fact that I can't watch GAA or Rugby matches in my native language; English (Nobody in my family has spoken Irish as a first language for over 200 years).
I'd also close gaelscoils as they are the ultimate form of social apartheid; keeping the poor away from the little middle-class darlings.
 
I'd scrap the TV licence.

10% of households dodge the licence fee despite the constant stream of threatening (wasteful) adverts, Garda and court time is also wasted on this . . many don't pay the court fine and instead are escorted to prison and detained for a few hours . . the whole thing is crazy and wasteful.

The TV licence, in its current guise, has had its day. There has to be a simpler, less antagonising, way to fund public service broadcasting. Surely the €200m or so raised by the current licence can instead be raised by a levy on broadband/TV packages provided by Virgin, Sky, Eir and others. They might take the hit themselves (or part thereof).
 
What about dog licences? They are just a subsidy for Post Offices. What's the point other than that?
 
Purple said:
What about dog licences? They are just a subsidy for Post Offices. What's the point other than that?
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Why is there such rabid discrimination towards dogs anyway? Aren't they man's BFF and all that? What about cats? Hate cats.
 
I would ban people in housing estates/towns from keeping chickens. We have a cockerel running around my estate at the minute and he's too fast to run over. He is noisy as hell in the morning
 
I have a looooong list. I'll start with 2.
  • Death penalty for anyone breaking trees. Council plant saplings along a new road for example and some psycho teenager goes along snapping the trunks for the craic
  • Shopping trolley licences for old people (nearly always newly retired men) who can't manage to manoeuvre their trolleys and block the aisles and look blankly at you when you're trying to get by while giving their elderly wives instructions on how best and most efficiently to do the shopping / bagging despite the fact that most have managed without them for 40 years.
 
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ali said:
I have a looooong list. I'll start with 2.
  • Death penalty for anyone breaking trees. Council plant saplings along a new road for example and some psycho teenager goes along snapping the trunks for the craic
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Not a bad idea. A few strategically placed platforms for Garda snipers would probably do.

ali said:
  • Shopping trolley licences for old people (nearly always newly retired men) who can't manage to manoeuvre their trolleys and block the aisles and look blankly at you when you're trying to get by while giving their elderly wives instructions on how best and most efficiently to do the shopping / bagging despite the fact that most have managed without them for 40 years.
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I make it legal to taser people, usually older women, who leave their shopping trolleys blocking the isle while looking at produce (pawing loose fruit, crushing bread etc). I like to move the trollys out of the way, sometimes into the next isle, or place random small but expensive items in them.
 
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People (usually groups of women walking 3 / 4 abreast) walking around Marlay Park with their dogs on long setting of extendable leads so they take over the entire footpath so you've to move onto the grass to walk or run past them or jump the lead or trip and break your teeth. If I stop in my tracks and look at them to bring their attention to it so they can reel their lead back in they stare at me as if I'm the one with bad manners.

Not quite a death penalty one but definitely hard labour.

Also similar feelings about parents who let their adorable toddlers waddle around into the path of runners and then look at you expectantly for you to give them a smile communicating the adorableness of their kids. I've news for you people - other people's children aren't cute.
 
ali said:
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People (usually groups of women walking 3 / 4 abreast) walking around Marlay Park with their dogs on long setting of extendable leads so they take over the entire footpath so you've to move onto the grass to walk or run past them or jump the lead or trip and break your teeth. If I stop in my tracks and look at them to bring their attention to it so they can reel their lead back in they stare at me as if I'm the one with bad manners.

Not quite a death penalty one but definitely hard labour.
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I was walking my dog in that very park a few years ago and another dog, not on a lead, ran over and started nipping at my dog. I put my foot under the other dog and kind of lifted it into the stream (it's a small but muddy stream). The woman who owned it then came around the corner and started shouting at me. I told her that if she apologised to me for the distress her uncontrolled dog had caused I would let the matter drop. She got even angrier :D.

ali said:
Also similar feelings about parents who let their adorable toddlers waddle around into the path of runners and then look at you expectantly for you to give them a smile communicating the adorableness of their kids. I've news for you people - other people's children aren't cute.
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People who let their dogs and children walk on cycle paths is by bugbear. If you cycle into a small child at 20 miles an hour you could be badly hurt! I'd make it legal for cyclists to slap pedestrians in the head (back or front depending on the direction of travel) as they pass if the pedestrian is on the cycle path. Children and dogs could be kicked out of the way. If your child was kicked into the road by a cyclist travelling at 20 or 30 miles an hour you would remember not to let them walk on a cycle path again.
 
I'm just warming up.

People who bring their dogs to a DOG PARK (whose sole purpose is to let your dog off the lead to explore, sniff and interact with other dogs) who proceed to have a heart attack when your dog approaches theirs. - Fifty lashes.

People who place bags of smelly household rubbish into their cars and drive up towards the mountains where I live and dump their rubbish at the side of the road for their bags to burst and destroy the place - They get their legs broken slowly.

People who were offended yesterday when Katie Price used the word Nigger to describe the abuse her son was getting and who felt that due to her whiteness she should be precluded from using it. A horrible racial slur used to describe her biological, mixed race little boy and she's not allowed to voice the word. New wave PC crap. - Mass internment.
 
Purple said:
I was walking my dog in that very park a few years ago and another dog, not on a lead, ran over and started nipping at my dog. I put my foot under the other dog and kind of lifted it into the stream (it's a small but muddy stream).
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You should try it with a cat sometime, it's great how they just seem to wrap around your foot. You could easily get 10 or 15 feet with them. Their reaction to landing in a stream would be great too.
 
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Purple said:
I was walking my dog in that very park a few years ago and another dog, not on a lead, ran over and started nipping at my dog.
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Reminds me of a time long ago when I was at the beach with our new pup (German Shepherd of about 6 months). The pup was off the lead and we were running among the baby dunes in Inchydoney (a lovely spot). Anyway, we come across a family all sitting around a big parcel of tinfoil. The Dad was about to slice some slices off a cooked chicken when the pup jumps in, grabs the whole chicken and makes off like a mad yoke!! It's was hilarious. Your man goes ape at me (I must have been about 14 at the time). Ah, the days!!
 
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Firefly said:
Reminds me of a time long ago when I was at the beach with our new pup (German Shepherd of about 6 months). The pup was off the lead and we were running among the baby dunes in Inchydoney (a lovely spot). Anyway, we come across a family all sitting around a big parcel of tinfoil. The Dad was about to slice some slices off a cooked chicken when the pup jumps in, grabs the whole chicken and makes off like a mad yoke!! It's was hilarious. Your man goes ape at me (I must have been about 14 at the time). Ah, the days!!
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I would have eaten your dog :p
 
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