Hi in regards to your moms present i think you might try making her a video with messages from all her friends and family ask your brother for a message via webcam if possible turn it into a dvd. Then have a small dinner party for her and play her the video it will last a lifetime.She will appreciate all the effort. Another suggestion if you want to go the party route how about organize a sort of reunion fort her get together some of her friends she hasnt seen for years and give her a this is your life type of party.She'd love it