Mid Life Career Crisis?

M

MandaC

Registered User
Messages
1,778
I have got a new job that entails what I call a long commute (approx hour and quarter - hour and a half each way) and am not warming to it. To be honest, it is making me miserable.

Have only started the job recently. I am on a fair enough salary and the potential is there to earn considerably more.

Very recent circumstances (death of a close friend) has made me question the whole work and corporate mentality. I find it boring and false.

Am thinking of chucking in my "career" in favour of a "job" where I can live an ok lifestyle and have time to do personal things outside work and work to live as opposed live to work.

Some people I have talked to have said I am mad in this day and age to even consider this when I will be taking a 20% pay cut for starters. I will also be capping my potential future earnings to what they are now and I will also be moving away from the area of where somne of my skills (which are in higher demand) are.

Recently, I have lost interest in material things and just want enough to pay my mortgage and live a happy lifestyle.

Am I mad, given the current climate to even consider chucking it in?

Has anyone else opted out of the "rat race" and if so, how have you fared?
 
MandaC said:
Am I mad, given the current climate to even consider chucking it in?
Click to expand...

The mad are those who fail to have perspective.

As long as you have enough for all you need (whatever they may be) trust yourself to make the right choices for you. As the saying goes, life ain't a dress rehearsal.
 
If the commute is getting you down as much as you describe then follow your heart and pack it in. When I stopped commuting some years ago I felt like I got my life back. I was lucky enough to not take a pay hit or carear change though.
 
Work to live or live to work etc. That said I wouldn't pack it in until I had something else lined up.
 
I think everyone, no matter what they do gets bored of it. I would not make any rash deceisions. You say you lost a friend recently, which is probably why you are miserable. You are grieving. I would give the job atleast six months. Set a date to leave and when that time comes see how you feel. If you still feel like it's not for you then you will have no regretts after you leave.
Don't underestimate the grieving process, it can be long and hard. Talk to people close to you, sharing helps.
 
Know how you feel MandaC - often have thoughts of same myself.

What would you think about doing to keep the roof over the head if you made a change?

Theres also the option of working a 4 day week? With the way tax works you wouldnt lose a full fifth of the take home pay - so youd be close enough to current salary but working less hours?
 
Take your time Manda, don't rush into any decisions the way you're feeling now.
Ask yourself why you went for the new job in the first place.
Sounds like you have goals and aspirations, a 'dead-end' job may not be for you in the long run.
 
Theres a book, what colour is your parachute which might be helpful. You'll get it in the library.
 
Just did something similar myself, loved job but long commute is only do-able longer term if you work very regular hours. Otherwise whole week can start to feel pointless.
Best of luck figuring it out - not an easy decision to make but I followed my gut feeling and have high hopes it'll work for me. BTW didn't take a pay cut which helped but you always give something up when choosing something else. It's just a matter of what you want more - challenges, prestigious career or time to relax and have fun with those you love??
 
Don't rush into anything, but there is no harm in looking round at other options to see what's out there. It may well take 6-12 months to find the right alternative anyway.

I moved from a very demanding role to a still-demanding-but-less-hours role 3 years ago. I'm earning about 2/3rds of the money for 2/3rds of the hours. I get to spend a lot more time with the family. The reduced income does hurt, but I'm happy with my decision.
 
MandaC said:
I have got a new job that entails what I call a long commute (approx hour and quarter - hour and a half each way) and am not warming to it. To be honest, it is making me miserable.

Have only started the job recently. I am on a fair enough salary and the potential is there to earn considerably more.

Very recent circumstances (death of a close friend) has made me question the whole work and corporate mentality. I find it boring and false.

Am thinking of chucking in my "career" in favour of a "job" where I can live an ok lifestyle and have time to do personal things outside work and work to live as opposed live to work.

Some people I have talked to have said I am mad in this day and age to even consider this when I will be taking a 20% pay cut for starters. I will also be capping my potential future earnings to what they are now and I will also be moving away from the area of where somne of my skills (which are in higher demand) are.

Recently, I have lost interest in material things and just want enough to pay my mortgage and live a happy lifestyle.

Am I mad, given the current climate to even consider chucking it in?

Has anyone else opted out of the "rat race" and if so, how have you fared?
Click to expand...


Watched a movie recently called 'Into the Wild' (I think that was it). About a young guy who burned all his money and hitched around America and camped and met people and had adventures etc etc. He ended up in the Alaskan wilderness and 'found himself'. The movie certainly made me think. Based on a true story. The ending is a bit sad though.
 
Thanks for all the different thoughts and I will take out that book out of the Library. All of the inputs have been very helpful.

My mind is now more or less made up and I will review my options over the next while and take it from there.

Yes, the death of my friend has shocked me, but in fairness I have been starting to think this way prior to that.

Will post an update of how I get on.
 
I changed my career six years ago along with my location. I decided I'd post a comment here mainly because the language you used to describe your office environment ("boring and false") reminded me of what it was like.

I spent a number of years building a "career" but found more and more that my personality and character traits that made me "me" were being eroded by the persona I felt I had to take on in the office to get ahead.

I took a pay cut of 15% at the time but also accepted the likely progressive divergence of my previous colleagues salaries and my new projected salary.

My commute dropped from 2 hours everyday to 10 mins and I took on all my old past times that I had enjoyed and then shelved when I started working along with some new ones.

Six years on and I know many of my old contempories are on roughly a €1000 nett extra a month. Every now and then it irks me, but I feel that even if I had that €1000 extra a month in my current life it wouldn't be enough to change my lifestyle much. I also think that because of my low commute and low cost of living being away from the city, that €1000 difference really becomes more like €500.

Anytime I meet my old workmates I know that they are far more envious of me than I of them, and they suggest that they would like to follow my example but are too far along their career path to give up what they've worked for.

There are sacrifices, but they are unimportant in the grand scheme of things. I'm very happy with my route so far and the effect it has on my family life is all positive.

Like other posters, I wouldn't advise a knee-jerk decision, but then I think you're further along in the thinking process for that.

Best of luck.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top