Making a new will unequal shares

[Cervelo]

I can see how families end up in court.

There's nothing like an unequal will to bring out the best in people and sometimes it take years to surface
I know it's your mothers decision but I think sometimes the simplest solution to this issue is the simplest will
Your mother should only divide her estate equally between her four surviving children with the instruction to sell the house

 

[Annieindublin]

Thanks everyone

Good to see a few potential issues before we talk to a lawyer.
Sis A would be mad to say no, cheap house! Like why not?
Mum has been reminded that she can’t control long term use of it easily. Unless she leaves sis A a life interest. Crazy as she’s the youngest.

Sis A has no kids, the rest of us have 9 between us. Sister’s hubby has 2 nephews. Again mum realises that Downton Abbey might leave the family in due course.

All of this is mums decision. She is doing a great job of disconnected conversations between 3 of us.

We haven’t discussed long term care costs. I’ll talk to her about that.

Mum has seen her extended family fall apart over houses and land. Generational trauma. But she’s now setting up the same.

I think she needs to talk to a lawyer, on her own with none of us involved.

 

[Annieindublin]

The widow and children of the my deceased brother haven’t been involved in any of care for mum or indeed my dad. We never hear from them. Mum isn’t inclined to leave them out entirely but wants to minimise tax.

 

[DannyBoyD]

But she’s now setting up the same.

This is a key point. Its hard to let go.

For what its worth I struggled with writing my own will for similar reasons.

In the end, I came to the conclusion that I'll be dead & beyond caring.

Anyone who inherits anything from me will be a functioning adult & should be free to make their own choices.

 

[Clamball]

It is great your Mum wishes to speak to a solicitor by herself to get independent advice and not be influenced by her family. I think it is mad she is not looping Sis A into the conversation and finding out what she thinks of the situation. Sis A may have many reasons for currently renting and have zero intention of moving to the family mansion. Or will sell the moment the house is left to her. Which if she came on here and posted everyone would recommend that she do.

Your Mum needs to be clear on how her wishes can be followed if a) all cash is significantly depleted on her death. b) The house is in fair deal.

She also needs to consider if she draws up will leaving house to Sis A; €40k each to 2 grandkids and €20K to her DIL leaving the remaining cash €100K to the other 3 children what she can expect for the remainder of her life. Will she phone Annie and say drop everything and help me in a task that is long complicated and miserable because I am old and sick and you are my daughter and I need you now and Annie very mildly says - Ask Sis A - she is clearly the favoured child and she may as well earn her inheritance….