Funeral Arrangements Advice (for me!)

T

Tetragon

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I'm single and this has been on my to do list for a long time.

I'm biting the bullet and tackling it now.

I'm in my mid forties, no close dependants.

I have a thread about making a will here so this may give you an idea where I'm coming from.

I'm a lapsed Catholic - I don't attend mass anymore etc. the whole concept is now alien to me personally. I lead a simple, quiet life and hope to depart the same way ... without any fuss.

I'm thinking of a simple ceremony, a quiet but quick departure via cremation.

What do I need to be aware of? Where do I start? Where should I ask that my ashes be put? etc.
 
Hi Tetragon,

At mid-40s you're getting this matter organised well ahead of time but I see from your other thread that its something that you want to get out of the way.

This key post may/may not give some advice.
 
gawd your very young to be thinking of this... I'm past my sell by date and haven't really started yet.:D


Basically you should have some idea of what you want and then go and discuss it with a funeral undertaker, he will cost things for you and suggest options.

As regards dispersal of the ashes this is your choice as to what you want, and to choose someone who will take care of that for you.


You could start here CREMATIONS C.I.C. or FuneralsOnline
 
Tetragon said:
. I lead a simple, quiet life and hope to depart the same way ... without any fuss.

I'm thinking of a simple ceremony, a quiet but quick departure via cremation.
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I suggest you visit the Island crematorium in Ringaskiddy, Co. Cork and there you will find what you are looking for. A truly beautiful place, and life affirming, even in death. Go early in the morning to see it at it's best. Don't look it up on the web, just make a visit.
 
Bronte said:
I suggest you visit the Island crematorium in Ringaskiddy, Co. Cork and there you will find what you are looking for. A truly beautiful place, and life affirming, even in death. Go early in the morning to see it at it's best. Don't look it up on the web, just make a visit.
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Completely agree with here.
Having attended my fair share of funerals I have to say the only one that stands out in terms of peace, dignity and (while it may sound inappropriate for the occasion) WOW factor, the Island is truly out of this world. Attended a service there last year, nice calm day, high tide and absolute picturesque setting. A number of overseas family members attended and all of them were commenting on the Island.
I've since changed my wishes to opt for cremation - I'm only early 40's but at least my family are aware of my wishes should the unthinkable happen - although I don't plan on using the facility anytime soon.
 
Thanks for all the advice posted above.

I've got lots to read and mull over before I finally put pen to paper.
 
It might not be relevant to you but I believe that your funeral wishes are not binding on your next of kin. The thing to do, if you feel your wishes will not be respected (religious relatives have been known to step in and arrange religious funerals for non-believing relatives), is to make the funeral arrangements part of the bequest to a beneficiary.
 
You may include your funeral plans in your will. You have a choice then of making them 'wishes' or more specifically 'direct' your executor to carry out same which is more legally binding on him.
 
Bronte said:
I suggest you visit the Island crematorium in Ringaskiddy, Co. Cork and there you will find what you are looking for. A truly beautiful place, and life affirming, even in death. Go early in the morning to see it at it's best. Don't look it up on the web, just make a visit.
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Can you choose where to be cremated or is it linked in anyway to where you live? For example, the crematorium at Newlands Cross describes itself as "designed to fulfill the burial and cremation requirements for West Dublin", while the Mount Jerome website states "whilst we primarily receive funerals from the communities of South Dublin, we also receive funerals from all over Ireland". Just might be another thing to take into consideration.
 
Janet I presume it's down to how many cremations they can do a day, they are limited by how many 'facilities' they have. And limited by time slots. You cannot have one for example in Cork after lunch on Saturdays or at all on Sundays.

Edit - sorry Janet, you are of the other thread. PM me if you want more details. The place in Ringaskiddy will not be outdone. On every aspect.
 
Is it possible to have a funeral with absolutely no religious involvement at all? I am looking for something quiet and tasteful. Also absolutely no death notices.
 
Thanks, don't actually need any details. Having been to Newlands Cross last year for a funeral I kind of expected to land there again last week but instead it was Mount Jerome and I was kind of wondering why. Have to say I far preferred Newlands Cross, even though the graveyard surrounding Mount Jerome looked very creepily interesting.
 
Time said:
Is it possible to have a funeral with absolutely no religious involvement at all? I am looking for something quiet and tasteful. Also absolutely no death notices.
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Someone mentioned a humanist ceremony above. I'm not sure what exactly that entails but it might be worth looking into. I know a friend told me last week that she was involved in organising a humanist funeral for someone a while ago and it was a nightmare to organise because you didn't have the traditional aspects of the mass to form a frame of reference. So I'd probably do my best to have as much as possible organised myself ahead of time (if it were feasible).

I don't know about burial without a religious ceremony but the crematorium part of both of the most recent funerals I've been to weren't religious.
 
I have been to a funeral/burial which had been planned meticulously by the deceased. Music and speeches by members of the family in local community centre. Poems and words by the grave from family, and a wonderful party afterwards. Very fitting. No reference to religion/God.
 
Time said:
Is it possible to have a funeral with absolutely no religious involvement at all?
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Of course it is. What makes you think it has to be religious? You won't be able to stop people saying prayers though, it is Ireland after all !
 
Are there still such things as 'pauper's graves' and whats envolved exactly
 
pudds said:
Are there still such things as 'pauper's graves' and whats envolved exactly
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According to our good friend www.citizensinformation.ie
Burial where the deceased has no means

If someone dies without the means to pay for burial and if this person has no traceable next of kin, it is the responsibility of the Department of Social Protection or local authority to ensure that the person is buried in a dignified manner that does not impinge on public health or public decency. The Department or local authority will also be liable for the charges and costs involved in doing so.


http://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/death/after_a_death/burials.html
 
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