Estate Agent will not accept our offer!

I am very tempted to put a letter through the owner's door to alert her to her EA's behaviour.

I don't really think she'd care ... after all, the EA is squeezing you for a few extra grand for her new 42" plasma TV or whatever.
 
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She might care if there is no other bidder and HMC pulls out of the deal!

HMC... Let us know if they do gete back in touch.
 
I viewed a vacant house a couple of weeks ago which had just recently gone on the market. Fed up of looking around and really liking the house, I offered the full asking price (I am mortgage approved, renting, can move quickly). Since then, the EA has been giving me the runaround. I am certain I am bidding against a phantom bidder.

I had the same experience buying an apartment in Drogheda. I was sure I was up against a "phantom bidder", until the sale eventually went through in my favour. The tenant was able to tell me afterwards that he had met the second bidder 2 times, and had overheard her saying she would increase her bid to 266K. 267K eventually secured me the apartment. My point is, it a frustrating business bidding against someone, and you can be forgiven to think that the EA is leading you a merry dance. In my case there was a second bidder, and there may be in yours also. Remember it is still a sellers market.
 
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