Downsizing. Has anyone done this and any regrets?

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Laramie

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Both myself and my wife have just turned 70 years. We live in a 5 bed detached home in South County Dublin. We enjoy our garden and we grow some veg every year, more as a hobby than anything else. We like the location of our home, on a nice leafy road, with mix and styles of housing. Close to the DART and N11. All shops and supermarkets nearby. Close to hospitals etc.

We are finding that tending to the garden and home is becoming more of a drag as we get older. We really haven't upgraded our home over the 30 years that we have lived in it. We can afford to do this but not sure if we want to go through the hassle of builders, architects stress etc.

We have been thinking of downsizing for some time but are almost afraid to take that step.

We would like to stay in the immediate area but not sure if moving to an apartment is too big a step.......we have lots of rooms full of furniture and "stuff" we have collected over the years. We have a garage full of stuff. So we would need a 3 bed apartment with good storage......but in my heart I know we don't need three bedrooms but I feel I want to downsize in steps rather than go the full hog.

Another possibility is to lock up our home for the winter and move to different locations in Spain etc for a few of the winter months. We can afford to do this.

I would welcome the views of others on this and from anyone who has already downsized.
 
Hi Laramie

A very interesting question.

First of all, do you need all that "stuff"? I would suggest getting rid of all the stuff. And then see where you are.

Instead of cleaning and gardening yourselves you could pay someone to do it.

Try these first before making any big trade down decision.

Brendan
 
Laramie said:
I would welcome the views of others on this and from anyone who has already downsized.
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My parents are not in a similar situation to yours and are having similar thoughts. My advice is make whatever your decision is soon as if you don't do it now you won't do it in five years.

I've seen most elderly relatives get to the point where they can't use stairs and those who've lived in bungalows have done best.

In your case a penthouse apartment with a lift could be much more useful to you than an upstairs and a garden that you can't use anymore.
 
Brendan Burgess said:
First of all, do you need all that "stuff"? I would suggest getting rid of all the stuff. And then see where you are.

Instead of cleaning and gardening yourselves you could pay someone to do it.
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+ 1 to this.

It's a lot cheaper than moving, a lot less hassle and you continue living in an area that you know works for you.

Re. Spain... why not do this also?
 
Moving from a 5 bed to an apartment would be a very big move.

Coyote's idea of a bungalow is a great idea. But maybe not yet. Going up and down stairs is good exercise . ( I use the same argument when people tell me I should get an electric bike. I could but I would reduce my exercise as a result.)

Laramie said:
Another possibility is to lock up our home for the winter and move to different locations in Spain etc for a few of the winter months. We can afford to do this.
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That is a good reason for getting an apartment. Much easier to lock up for a long time.

Brendan
 
We’re in a similar position to Laramie, but we do not intend downsizing. We’ve put too much into the house over the years and our neighbours are good. Why risk moving and having bad new neighbours? Our garden is manageable and in fact has become our favourite place, weather permitting.

Since retiring five years ago we live outside of Ireland (Spain) for six months per year (non consecutive months). We haven’t seen ice or frost or snow and only had little rain and have had loads of sunshine. @Purple called this living the dream and I agree (not often I agree with him). But, we are happy to return to our home in Ireland whenever.

Apartment living in Ireland is not for us; some friends downsized to apartment living and hate it for various reasons.

For the record:- Living in Spain for extended periods is not holidaying. Life is slower, utilities are cheaper, living is not as expensive as in Ireland. We have affordable membership of a health club. I swim in the Med even during December. Eating out is about a third of Irish cost. We watch RTE television nightly, don’t miss any GAA matches. My Spanish is good. We can exercise every day. Next winter we will bring our own car.
 
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Start decluttering now, get rid of as much of the 'stuff' as you can, not family photos type things but definitely excess furniture and other random gathered stuff. I'm a bit younger than you but have cleared out as much as I can of the stuff I don't use and don't see myself ever needing or using again, it's an ongoing process. I have only one child though and the thought of them having to clear out my house on their own if I dropped dead in the morning is enough to make me do it!

I am probably though a bit scarred from having to do all my mother's clothes and personal stuff and she had a lot when she died, had to do it mainly on my own as other children younger and my Dad God help him was not able for it. Fast forward to when he died 4 yrs ago and there is 4 of us but again an awful job getting rid of 'stuff' that should have gone years ago and was of no use to him or anyone else either, skips full, it's very hard.

So do everyone a favour and declutter, I agree with Brendan on the exercise a stairs provides but make sure you have downstairs facilities just in case. If you're a gardener as I am I think it would be very hard to move somewhere like an apartment, same if you've lived in detached house, I occasionally stay with a friend who has an apartment and the sounds from upstairs/downstairs/through the walls I would find hard to deal with!
 
A cousin of mine and his wife downsized to an apartment a few years ago and now regret it.

They had a beautiful house, exactly the way they wanted it, with a large, but manageable, garden. They felt it was too big for their needs, which it may have been, but they now miss the sense of space that came with it.

It seems that you like your house as it is and that you’re not under pressure to access its worth for any reason. Why then should you move?

As Brendan has suggested, pay someone to do your garden and have a martini while you watch them do so.
 
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My parents in law did this, left a huge house and moved to a two bed. They were delighted. Everything is easier, warmer, more time to do things and travel, no maintenance. They did so in their 60's. They just bit the bullet and sent stuff for auction.
 
I was mulling over the same question recently. We have a thrice extended 5 bed split level bungalow in a scenic area 10 minutes drive from the town but with no shop within walking distance, and an acre of garden. I'm early 70s, older than himself, and assumed we would downsize to nearer town in the next year or two. He agreed but I know he loves his garden and really, truly doesn't want to move.

So I looked at what's available locally, and the more I looked the less I liked what I found - tiny "old person" bungalows with one bathroom (we have 4), houses in estates where you're on top of your neighbours, properties that would need a ton of renovations to bring them up to standard. So I've told himself I've stopped looking, that maybe down the line we'll move, but in my heart I know we probably won't. Overall the advantages we have here outweigh the disadvantages. Maybe all I need is a good reliable house cleaner and a clutch-free car.
 
Laramie said:
Another possibility is to lock up our home for the winter and move to different locations in Spain etc for a few of the winter months
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Would it be a lot easier to 'shut up shop' and spend time abroad if you had a smaller, lower maintenance, property in Dublin?
I'm much younger, but have the opportunity to spend long periods abroad, and having a large property here is one of the things holding me back.

On the downsizing, I've relatives who've considered it, and it the lack of suitable properties to move to has kept them where they are. They don't want to move from an area they've lived for 40 years with good neighbours, to an apartment block predominantly occupied by renters in their 20s and 30s.
 
Since the location is ideal, I don't think it's a good idea to move, Laramie.
My age and position is similar. Within a short walk from the house I have shops, cinema, bus stop, cafes, library etc.

Getting rid of "stuff" is the first thing to do. My husband was a hoarder, and I have been round each room in the house two or three times, getting rid of what can go. The cleaned rooms then get some stuff I'm not yet ready to clear out. It's a gradual process.

I agree with paying people to do what you don't want to do yourself. Keep growing your veg, but have someone else trim the trees. A spacious house and garden means you will always have something to do, somewhere to potter or exercise.

I had a shower put in downstairs when my husband became unable to climb the stairs. When that time comes for me I will move into the downstairs bedroom. Meanwhile I am having work done on the house to make it more comfortable for myself, not modernising or changing very much. Again, it's a gradual process.

There are problems with planning to spend winter overseas: insurance, what's happening to your empty house, travel disruptions, what if you get sick etc. I take several short trips a year, and one long one of 4-6 weeks, but I have a lodger in the house who will let me know of any problems. I am lucky to live near Cork airport, with year-round access to everywhere (not all direct routes) but I have noticed I am a more anxious traveller as I get older.

If you enjoy the house and location, stay. Fix the other things you aren't happy with.
 
RedOnion said:
They don't want to move from an area they've lived for 40 years with good neighbours, to an apartment block predominantly occupied by renters in their 20s and 30s.
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This is very true. For most downsizers buying into an existing development wouldn’t be wise.

However there are some small, very high end new developments like this one where a lot of your neighbours are likely to be of a similar demographic.

The other critical thing is to live in a penthouse. Noisy neighbours upstairs is awful, downstairs much less of a problem
 
Thanks everyone for the feedback.

At some stage or another we have discussed all of the above suggestions among ourselves.

We have someone who trims back our garden trees now. I have stopped cleaning our windows and I no longer feel the need to climb up a ladder anymore. I even pay to have my car washed and hoovered..

My wife would move in to an apartment tomorrow. I am not so keen.

My son bought a 3 bed semi close to us a few years back and spent €200k on refurbishment. It's a fantastic job......but we have lived in a detached home for over 45 years. We like the space. We also lived in a bungalow for 15 years and loved it. Easy to maintain. I would move to a bungalow with garage if I found one already refurbished. At least that's what I tell myself but I am not sure when it came to the crunch that I would.

We have enough room downstairs to turn our dining room in to a bedroom and also room to put in a good sized bathroom. I like the idea of having a room available for a live in carer.

NoRegretsCoyot. We actually viewed the mock up of The Pinnacle apartments in Mount Merrion. (We used to visit the Stella Cinema where they are building these as teenagers). The idea of looking over a busy street actually appealed to us. We know the area extremely well. Not sure that I would want to spend €900k on an apartment a third the size of our existing home. There are other apartments and stand alone new properties coming on stream in the area and we will view them in due course.

We are travelling to Spain next week to have a look at an area around Murcia. I know that Leper has a place local and is always helpful in his advice. We think that we will spend a winter month or two in Spain and see how this works out.

Getting rid of stuff would be difficult for us. Our existing rooms all have furniture, even though those rooms are seldom used.

I think we have left it too late to move. I think we should have done it 10 years ago. We have had grandchildren stay with us....but even they are getting old now and don't stay as much. Not only are our own children's toys still sitting in boxes...but our grand children's toys are now sitting unused.
 
Interesting topic. We are in the same area and same housetype. Only myself is into gardening and it is a very small garden with no hedges or grass so that is a plus. My mother lived at home to her 102nd year and in the last years had a stairlift and live in carer. I had the sad job of clearing her house and possessions and it was sobering how the treasured family heirlooms were unwanted by younger family and fetched paltry amounts at auction. Yes it makes sense to downsize or 'resize' but there is no attractive proposition to move to that ticks all the boxes. This house could be divided into two living units. I thought there was some scheme that allowed for this in recent years? otherwise 'subdivision' of a family home is prohibited? A new kitchen is badly needed and apart from the cost, I do not think we could bear the disruption that it would cause.
 
Laramie said:
Thanks everyone for the feedback.

At some stage or another we have discussed all of the above suggestions among ourselves.

We have someone who trims back our garden trees now. I have stopped cleaning our windows and I no longer feel the need to climb up a ladder anymore. I even pay to have my car washed and hoovered..

My wife would move in to an apartment tomorrow. I am not so keen.

My son bought a 3 bed semi close to us a few years back and spent €200k on refurbishment. It's a fantastic job......but we have lived in a detached home for over 45 years. We like the space. We also lived in a bungalow for 15 years and loved it. Easy to maintain. I would move to a bungalow with garage if I found one already refurbished. At least that's what I tell myself but I am not sure when it came to the crunch that I would.

We have enough room downstairs to turn our dining room in to a bedroom and also room to put in a good sized bathroom. I like the idea of having a room available for a live in carer.

NoRegretsCoyot. We actually viewed the mock up of The Pinnacle apartments in Mount Merrion. (We used to visit the Stella Cinema where they are building these as teenagers). The idea of looking over a busy street actually appealed to us. We know the area extremely well. Not sure that I would want to spend €900k on an apartment a third the size of our existing home. There are other apartments and stand alone new properties coming on stream in the area and we will view them in due course.

We are travelling to Spain next week to have a look at an area around Murcia. I know that Leper has a place local and is always helpful in his advice. We think that we will spend a winter month or two in Spain and see how this works out.

Getting rid of stuff would be difficult for us. Our existing rooms all have furniture, even though those rooms are seldom used.

I think we have left it too late to move. I think we should have done it 10 years ago. We have had grandchildren stay with us....but even they are getting old now and don't stay as much. Not only are our own children's toys still sitting in boxes...but our grand children's toys are now sitting unused.
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Would something like the stables in mount Merrion not have appealed? Think about the scenario where one of you passes away in the future, will the other person stay in the house or move then? If they would be likely to move better to do it now as a couple than leave someone have to do it alone on top of everything else imo.

Good luck whatever you decide
 
Monbretia said:
same if you've lived in detached house, I occasionally stay with a friend who has an apartment and the sounds from upstairs/downstairs/through the walls I would find hard to deal with!
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The main reason for not living in an apartment IMHO. Your chances of noise are 4 times greater if you are surrounded. Having lived with a noisy rented house next door for 14 years never want to go back there again. Never knowing at what time of day or night the music or party might start up can be dreadful. Penthouse/rooftop apartments can cause maintenance problems of their own as a friend found out much to her annoyance.

Also the money that you save on management fees can be used to pay people to do all the jobs that you can't manage yourself any longer.
 
My mother downsized, approx. ten years ago now, and she's never looked back. In fact, she'd tell you that she wished she had done it sooner.

She got to stay in the same area, so there were no issues with keeping in touch with friends, familiarity with the area, shops etc.

Having downsized, she still bought a house, rather than an apartment, so no real difference in terms of general layout. The house she bought is circa 1,090 sq ft 3-bed, so there's plenty of room for grandkids staying over etc. Her house was about 30 years old, so no real issues, other than updating the kitchen and bathroom.

Suffice to say, releasing equity as result of selling the old family home, gave her a notable level of additional financial independence, so she's been able to enjoy life a bit more than she otherwise might have done, in terms of cars, holidays, "lunch with the girls" etc etc.
 
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