child maintenance and christmas

He really needs to ask the child mother about this. She may not be assuming that he is buying all the Santa presents. It is very likely that she may want to decide what the child gets, so may not want to allow her ex to buy everything.
He is unlikely to know as much as the mother what exactly what would be the best presents for child to get from Santa.

Has it been agreed that the child is spending Christmas Eve with the Dad for the next two years, or is just because it happens to fall on the days that he has a visit.

Lots of issues to sort out, beyond who pays for the presents.
 
Well a child that get's loads of presents is bound to think they are in heaven. The hardest part of being a parent is saying no and not buying them too much, not spoiling them, normally the person who has to drop them to school everyday and decide the mundane things in life.

If in the current arrangement everyone is happy why look for some money at xmas when the father is quite happy to pay for 'loads' of presents already. Maybe the mother is buying one present for the child and she is happy with that.

Can't believe the parent is planning next xmas already.

What was completely omitted from the original post is the contribution the mother is making to the child's upbringing.

24 hours a day x 7 days minus the 4 hours once a week and the every second weekend. The day in day out grind. If the child is happy and healthy and everyone content leave well enough alone.
 
Bronte, not getting into a slagging match! yes his father got him a nice few presents for christmas whats wrong with that? if I came on here and said he got him nothing and would not contribute to anything you would still jump down my throat so there is no winning. I didnt say she didnt contribute or I didnt say she did but its kinda obvious she must be as he is living with her. he will just have to go to his solicitor and get some 'fair' agreement made. PS just cos his dad got him loads of presents for christmas doesnt mean he spoils him or lets him away with murder or never reprimands him, how can you tell he doesnt just from that sentence?
 
he feels that he has never had any problem giving his share so why should she? surely it works both ways
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Yes it does, and she already is.

I'm with Bronte here, if everyone is happy & things are trotting along nicely why in the name of all thats holy would you cause annoyance and upset over E100?
 
A little off topic but 4 hours once a week and every second weekend does not sound like a mother 'mad to get rid of the child'.

Whats the norm for christmas? Would he usually give the mother 100 euro towards santy presents if the child spends christmas with her?

Personally I think the father would be mad to rock the boat over 100 euro for santy presents.
 
dj123 said:
Bronte, not getting into a slagging match! yes his father got him a nice few presents for christmas whats wrong with that? if I came on here and said he got him nothing and would not contribute to anything you would still jump down my throat so there is no winning. I didnt say she didnt contribute or I didnt say she did but its kinda obvious she must be as he is living with her. he will just have to go to his solicitor and get some 'fair' agreement made. PS just cos his dad got him loads of presents for christmas doesnt mean he spoils him or lets him away with murder or never reprimands him, how can you tell he doesnt just from that sentence?
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You seem extremely defensive about this issue, calm down. The other posters are simply pointing out that there are two sides to every story. You seem to be maintaining that a woman who has a child on a full time basis with the exception of four hours a week and every second weekend is mad to get rid of her child. Quite frankly if your 'cousin' is planning to get legal over €100 ten months in advance of Christmas then I quite pity her. Out of interest what will his solicitor charge him so that he can save €100?? or is he just doing it to make a point..... if so I hope it's worth it!
 
I wouldn't rock the boat over €100 , everything seems to be going along as well as could be expected at the moment.

Especially as he is getting more access then she is required to give.
 
He wants her to pay half towards his presents? How bizarre. He buys his, she buys hers. He sounds really petty.

Plus he must be fairly well off if he was court ordered to pay €100 p/w for 1 child, its well over the average.
 
dj123 said:
? if I came on here and said he got him nothing and would not contribute to anything you would still jump down my throat so there is no winning. ?
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I would not judge someone on the amount of presents they did or didn't give a child. But I certainly would judge them on their willingness to contribute financially where they had the means to do so and on their willingness to keep things amicable for the sake of the child. Certainly in a situation where a parent does not have the means that would not make me think any less of that person.

Going to a solicitor over 100€ at xmas sounds like the father is the hard one to deal with and not the mother. This you have not addressed. There was also the subtle hint that the child would be happier with the father (based on 4 hours weekly and every second weekend) but no justification for this.
 
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