Buying with partner (unmarried)

H

Highlander

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Hi there,

I've read through dozens of posts with questions from couples who bought a home together and have since gone their separate ways.

My partner of 5 years and I are looking at properties at the moment with a view to moving out of our rented accomodation. If I'm to be honest, I'd probably prefer to hold off another year or so, but other half is very eager to move sooner rather than later....but that's a separate issue.

Talking figures, although we're approximately the same age (late twenties), I have been qualified for a number of years and have built a decent career (mid management private sector), salary (60k + bonus + annual share allocation + pension) and savings (approx 110k). My partner, on the other hand is just recently qualified, although no debts, has no savings, and a significantly lower salary.

Obviously, if we go ahead with a house purchase, I will be putting up the entire deposit, and likely paying the majority of the mortgage, bills, etc.

I don't want to suggest that we'd go ahead with such a large scale joint purchase if we weren't confident in our future together......but things do happen which aren't expected and I always think its best to be prepared.

Given the situation outlined above, would love to hear any advice/guidance/warnings you may have in this regard. Is there anything we can do up front to ensure it is recognised that I put up the majority of the property cost and that we can both know what to expect should the relationship not work out.

Thanks,
S
 
There are so many threads that deal with the aftermath of this - have a read through them.

I am not doubting the sincerity of your other half but (s)he has no savings but seems to want to use all your savings to buy a house - don't seem fair to me! But maybe that's just me.

I'd second what PaddyBloggit says. What's the rush? Hold off till your OH has some savings & you can go into this 50:50.

You can get a legal agreement drwan up to deal with the 'what ifs' if you buy together and then split up but regardless, it's messy, painful & can be very tricky depending of what market is doing.
 
I bought a house with my partner /yet unmarried/ but we are both putting in almost equal sums of money for a deposit and we are splitting the payments for life assurance, home insurance, solicitor fees, furniture etc.
If your partner, who does not have any means of her own yet is putting you under pressure, I'd suggest you resist and see how the relationship moves forward when she started her career. It doesn't mean she has to put in equal sums of money, especially when there is a difference in job experience but I'd suggest you simply have a look at how her financial responsibility is /ability to save money, contribute to bills etc/.
As for buying a house together, there is always a risk, doesn't matter whether you are married or not, it can always crash or work out and last.
I have the impression that you have some doubts about buying a property with your partner while carrying the whole financial risk so before you put yourself under even more pressure by having someone else deciding what to do with your own money, talk to your partner, explain her your dilemma and maybe even suggest starting a dual savings account where you'd put equal sums of money every month to see how it works out.
 
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Agree with the above posters. Just because your partner wants to move, doesn't mean you (ye) should buy together - you can still move! What is the rationale for buying a place? If it's for investment, then ask yourself if you'd be investing in property right now if it was just you. If your partner wants to invest in property, s/he needs to build up the means to do so. Or perhaps the rationale is an indirect way of moving your relationship to the next level of commitment.

It's a huge decision and, unless it's done as an investment, you should be rock solid in terms of intending to spend the rest of your lives together. If you think your partner may be using this (buying now, because prices are perceived to be cheap) as a back-door to get additional commitment from you, then you'd be mad to do it. It'd be easier to get out of an engagement if it doesn't work out, rather than getting out of a house-purchase in such a volatile market.

If you do decide to buy, make sure you have a written agreement. I'm a lawyer and have been asked on numerous occasions by people what they should do when buying with a partner. I always gave them the same advice. They *never* followed that advice (sigh). Not all broke up but those that did certainly regretted not having anything written down. Have a look at this site for info on living-together agreements and the types of things you need to think about.
 
Thanks for the responses folks. Sorry took so long to get back, but I've been travelling on business past couple of weeks.

Think Haminka1 hit the nail on the head with the comment that married or unmarried, things can take an unfavourable turn. As a couple, we are as solid as I can imagine us ever being. Certainly wouldn't even consider buying a property if we weren't. But, given the vastly differing levels of financial exposure in this transaction, I need to consider my own interests separate of our interests as a couple.....romantic, no. But sensible, absolutely!

There have been a couple of comments above regarding a legal agreement which can be drawn up detailing what would happen in the event of a split....do these types of agreements hold water in real terms, or if challenged are they more worthless than the paper they're written on? Understand that alot depends on the level of detail that is included etc. etc. etc.

Thanks again for your input. It is greatly appreciated.
S
 
I think whatever you put in to the house purchase and bill paying etc, it should be as a percentage of current earnings.
If someone is on a significantly lower salary than they can pay less, but make it fair as a proportion of salary.
Why don't you set up a joint account now (another good learning experience for a couple) - siphon in agreed proportions of your salaries every month/fortnight. Then pay the rent, utilify bills, grocery bills, etc. out of that.
You can also siphon some out of the joint account going to a joint savings account.
That way there can be no underlying resentments as to who's paying what.
 
Highlander what do YOU want? What have you both decided together in relation to going forward and as to ownership. From reading your posts are you committed to the relationship, if not then don't buy a house together as a couple.

In most relationships one partner earns more than the other.

Of course you can draw up a legal agreement, that is a very sensible thing to do if you are not married.
 
Why dont you buy a starter home 3bed semi in range of 250K and take the mtg on your own?
I would say its very insane to put all your money in one box when you are not married???
 
anuj21k said:
Why dont you buy a starter home 3bed semi in range of 250K and take the mtg on your own?
I would say its very insane to put all your money in one box when you are not married???
Click to expand...

I broadly agree with this, however, if the OP buys somewhere smaller by himself now and wishes to trade up with his wife later they will be hit for stamp duty because they will no longer by FTBs (also extra costs for auctioneers, solicitors). So it winds up being more expensive than if they went for the larger property now.
 
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