Best put-downs

L

LDFerguson

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Heard a phone-in on the radio about this the other morning.

A couple that I can remember...

Winston Churchill:
"I refuse to have a battle of wits with someone who is unarmed."

Anon:
"I used to have a pair of shoes like that...but then my father got a job."

Any takers?
 
Theres no beginning to your talents. (usually its "no end to").

From Have I got news for you, or one of those.
 
If brains were dirty you'd be clean.........

Or one of Groucho's.
I don't normally forget a face but I think I'll make an exception in your case.
 
Completely ignoring a person and asking those around u (except the person u ignoring)
''do u hear someone talking??''

Such a kids one but a horrible and mean 'put down' all the same!
 
you'd get change if you gave your two cent worth

Ignorance can be cured, stupid is forever

To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people
 
DeeFox said:
I'm drunk and you're ugly but I'll be sober in the morning.
Click to expand...


:D Just going to post that!

I believe WC Fields said it when being chastised by an uptight lady at a society gathering.

For sheer nastiness, the Johnny character in Mike Leigh's Naked, peering at a none too bright street urchin, heat tilted:

"What's it like being you?"
 
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Caveat said:
:D Just going to post that!

I believe WC Fields said it when being chastised by an uptight lady at a society gathering.
Click to expand...

I've heard this one attributed to various people, most commonly Winston Churchill. Various reports of it have him talking to Lady Astor or Elizabeth Braddock. I've also heard it attributed to WC Fields and even Ernest Hemmingway. Who knows?
 
A quick google seems to favour attributing the drunk/ugly one to churchill alright.
 
Another Groucho Marx: I didn't come here to be insulted. Why where do you normally go.

I've seen better legs hanging from a nest.
 
One of the worst I ever heard was said to a girl with acne

"Hi pizza face".
..........................................................

Or go up to a plain girl and ask her if any one has ever called her beautiful.
When she says 'no'.
You say 'I'm not surprised'

If she says, 'yes'.
You tell her 'You were lied to'.


Terrible
 
Or..

"You look like a million dollars...................







All green and wrinkled.."
 
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