Ulrika jonsson !!

MandaC said:
talking about them/looking down on them, (people like your good self, I suppose)

I will presume sarcasm on your part here. You are referring to a very different time, and to one child born out of wedlock, as opposed to

Ulrika Jonsson has four different fathers for her children.
quote]

I, like most people, know/am related to single mothers AND fathers and do not for one second look down on them/talk about them unless they are doing something that is not right for their kids through carelessness or irresponsibility. To suggest that I do is very presumptuous, indeed it would seem that you are taking the moral high ground that you think I already occupy.

This thread should be in LOS.
Click to expand...
 
qwertyuiop said:
Also - Her coming out doing tv documentaries specifically about her questioning whether she is a sex addict or not also puts her down a further peg in my book given her history.
(For those who don't now she did one about 3 or 4 years ago for channel 4 going through many of the people she has slept with)
Click to expand...
Qwerty yer something else!! Do you look similarly on the likes of George Best, Rod Stewart, Sean Connery and any other man who has boasted about how many women he has slept with?
 
qwertyuiop, what is your opinion of Coolio (!) who has six children with four different mothers?
 
So are yee all seriously saying that yee don't bat an eyelid if you meet someone who has had 4 kids from 4 different men and don't form a particular opinion of that person in your own head and don't lose even a little bit of respect for them ?

Rubbish !

That's my tuppence worth on the whole thing anyway.
 
baldyman27 said:
MandaC said:
talking about them/looking down on them, (people like your good self, I suppose)

I will presume sarcasm on your part here. You are referring to a very different time, and to one child born out of wedlock, as opposed to

Ulrika Jonsson has four different fathers for her children.
quote]

I, like most people, know/am related to single mothers AND fathers and do not for one second look down on them/talk about them unless they are doing something that is not right for their kids through carelessness or irresponsibility. To suggest that I do is very presumptuous, indeed it would seem that you are taking the moral high ground that you think I already occupy.


This thread should be in LOS.
Click to expand...

Perhaps if you re-read your post (No. 12 on this thread), you cleary state that you look down on Ulrika because of the path her life has taken. This clearly contradicts the above post(that you dont look down on/talk about single parents)
If that is not taking the high moral ground, then I dont know what is.?

When does it become ok to "look down on someone" - when they have 1 child, 2 children, 3 children? Who decides?

I d'ont have an issue with people disagreeing with any one else's life style choices. Its the divine right to "look down on" another person that I find very sad.
Click to expand...
 
MandaC said:
baldyman27 said:
Perhaps if you re-read your post quote]

Perhaps if you re-read my posts you would see that I don't look down on/talk about single parents unless they do something that is not even close to being in the best interests of the children.

Having 4 different father-figures in a family is, IMHO, not beneficial to the children and can only be disruptive and confusing for them. I presume I don't have to list the countless possible scenarios of this situation. Children are the responsibility of society as a whole, not just the parents/multiple parents.

When does it become ok to look down on Ulrikka or someone in a similar situation. I don't know. But surely the old adage 'measure twice and cut once' should have entered her head at some stage.
Click to expand...
Click to expand...
 
MandaC said:
I d'ont have an issue with people disagreeing with any one else's life style choices. Its the divine right to "look down on" another person that I find very sad.
Click to expand...

Ok - what exactly does "look down on" mean ?
For want of a better definition lets say it means you lose some respect for that person.
Assuming you are happy to go along with that definition then your statement above is not living in the real world.

What you are saying is your respect never goes down - and presumably therefore also never up - on someone ?
This doesn't make any sense.
By that logic you hold equal respect for everyone?
 
That's your definition. I suppose it is very subjective. In my opinion I think it is a bit stronger than that. I dont like the phrase.

http://thesaurus.reference.com/browse/look+down+on

To me, it indicates that by "looking down on" someone, you are superior to someone else in some way. To me, that is the way the first post came across.

I know someone who has three different fathers for her children. She is a fabulous parent/person who has overcome so much in her life. By your standards, you would be entitled to look down on this person. Believe me, you would not.
 
MandaC said:
That's your definition. I suppose it is very subjective. In my opinion I think it is a bit stronger than that. I dont like the phrase.

http://thesaurus.reference.com/browse/look+down+on

To me, it indicates that by "looking down on" someone, you are superior to someone else in some way. To me, that is the way the first post came across.

I know someone who has three different fathers for her children. She is a fabulous parent/person who has overcome so much in her life. By your standards, you would be entitled to look down on this person. Believe me, you would not.
Click to expand...

Well presumably no-one sets out to have multiple kids to multiple fathers.
And it is also very avoidable.
And given the consequences are as significant as they are one would imagine most would go to teh tiny bit of trouble involved to avoid it.
Like - rocket science it ain't !!
I feel it's very unfair on the kids and quite thoughtless not to make that tiny effort.

So for their lack of basic cop on and selfishness i simply have to have less respect for them than someone who does have the smarts not to get themselves into that situation.
There really is a serious lack of the most basic common sense at work there.
 
The girl I know had a baby at a very young age. Years later, she got married and had another baby. All three were as happy as. Her husband died (tragically) and she is so lucky to have found happines again with someone else, who also wanted to have another child. They are very happy family and could teach many families a thing or three.

People's lives sometimes do not work out to plan. Lives and circumstances are always complicated. Why should anyone feel ashamed/a lower person because their life did not take the "conventional" (in some people's mind' s) track.
 
MandaC said:
The girl I know had a baby at a very young age. Years later, she got married and had another baby. All three were as happy as. Her husband died (tragically) and she is so lucky to have found happines again with someone else, who also wanted to have another child. They are very happy family and could teach many families a thing or three.

People's lives sometimes do not work out to plan. Lives and circumstances are always complicated. Why should anyone feel ashamed/a lower person because their life did not take the "conventional" (in some people's mind' s) track.
Click to expand...

That's all well and good - but i am not really sure what your point is.
Obviously this lady is an exception in your head.

I don't believe for a second that if you were introuced to someone and you found out they had 4 kids to 4 different fathers that you wouldn't automatically form an impression of them based on this fact alone.
And rightly so for the reason i outlined above.

If you say otherwise you are only fooling yourself.
 
My point is - there is no such thing as normal. No, I dont see the lady I know as an exception, my personal view is that there are many families out there made up of second/third/relationships.

If someone was introduced to me who had four children with four different fathers, once they were financially supporting and looking after said children, I can safely say I would not give a monkeys.:confused:

I would certainly not feel in any way superior to them.

I would not like to be in that position, but if it happened c'est la vie.

There are more important things to be worried about.
 
MandaC said:
The girl I know had a baby at a very young age. Years later, she got married and had another baby. All three were as happy as. Her husband died (tragically) and she is so lucky to have found happines again with someone else, who also wanted to have another child. They are very happy family and could teach many families a thing or three.
Again, you're not comparing like with like.
Click to expand...
Click to expand...
 
having one dad doesn't equate to having good parents, there are many kids that would be better off without their dad. I do think there is a difference between 4 x 4 when they all came from long term relationships than 4 x4 from one night stands. I would see the first as being unlucky or maybe someone emotionally unstable and the second as careless and irresponsible.
 
MrMan said:
having one dad doesn't equate to having good parents, there are many kids that would be better off without their dad. I do think there is a difference between 4 x 4 when they all came from long term relationships than 4 x4 from one night stands. I would see the first as being unlucky or maybe someone emotionally unstable and the second as careless and irresponsible.
Click to expand...


I would pretty much agree 100% with this view.
 
Oh Boys, don't knock the lady....maybe she is unlike the rest of us wimen is an eternal optomist and imagines the next man won't be as violent / unsubstancial / wayward as the last.....and I hope for her that she has now met a man who can accompany her on the rocky road through life. Not because she or anyone needs to be with a man but because it may give her some joy.
 
Perhaps Ulrika was trying to create something like below. This excerpt was taken from a quasi-religious paper in the US. "But one ape species is different. The bonobos, a special kind of chimpanzee, live in a remote forest in Zaire. According to Wrangham and Peterson, the bonobos evolved under friendlier ecological conditions. This reduced the need for male dominance. It also allowed females to bond into groups. Today, these female groups restrain male behavior and enforce a kind of pacifism. As a result, bonobos not only don’t rape and murder each other, they also enjoy a lot of recreational sex".
I thought this is Utopia until I came across this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Xs8mEr2ivA&feature=related
 
gillarosa said:
Oh Boys, don't knock the lady....maybe she is unlike the rest of us wimen is an eternal optomist and imagines the next man won't be as violent / unsubstancial / wayward as the last.....and I hope for her that she has now met a man who can accompany her on the rocky road through life. Not because she or anyone needs to be with a man but because it may give her some joy.
Click to expand...

Personally speaking I think she should have learned about birth control.

Not sure what kind of family life they all have but out of sheer nosiness I'd love to be a fly on her wall on fathers day.
 
Just make sure you are out of range in case she turns around quickly. One of those would splatter you:D
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top