Personal Debt - don’t know where to turn

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Clodagh

Registered User
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13
Hi all,

Please excuse the long post in advance.

I have found myself in a situation where I am struggling with debt repayment beyond belief.

My current position is we have a mortgage which is fully up to date and never missed a payment. With regards to me personally then, I have a loan with AIB that I must have for 10 years now. It was for 10k initially, and was working away at paying it and then started struggling so with 2 clicks of the mouse on the AIB app I could top up my loan and have money in my account within 5 mins. So all these years later and after multiple top ups just to make ends meet I now still owe 9k. My repayments are €245 per month, I have a credit cards which I owe 1k, a credit union loan of €900 and a store card of €300 so all in all I pay over €400 per month on loan repayments alone.

I used to be able to scrape by but since before Christmas I just cannot make ends meet. I have literally no money for food electricity etc for 2 weeks of every month. My husband has a good job and pays mortgage ets from his account but what’s happening is because I am so broke, I'm dipping in to his account just for food etc and now both of us are completely struggling!!

I just don’t know where to turn!! Would the bank consider maybe an interest only option for a couple of years and allow us use that money to get rid of my debt??

Thank you for your time!
 
Deffo fill out the money makeover
Also start a money diary where you write down everything you spend.
Ask yourself when buying something is it a want or a need? Only buy what’s needed.
Good luck.
 
Clodagh it will all be about determining which debt to focus on first, but do the money makeover template giving all the info you can and this will help with better advice. Keep a spending diary to capture all spending and this will make you feel in control of your spending if you can record it, segregate it and count it.
 
Hi Clodagh, I've no problems with you doing a Money Makover on this forum and perhaps it will eventually help, but the bottom line is that you are in debt which needs to be dealt with. Nest-Egg said above it;s only money and things could be worse. Your journey out of debt will not be a short one, but you've got to start somewhere and fast. Here's my tuppence worth:-
1. Burn your credit card immediately.
2. Burn your store account card immediately.
3. Don't buy into any more AIB loan top-ups.
4. Reduce amount due on your credit card and store account card weekly until both are cleared.
5. Clear your AIB loan then bit-by-bit.
6. You may already be food shopping frugally so you might/might not be able to delve into this for savings. But, you must eat healthily. You've got to look at clothing expense too.
7. Personal Activities (only saying!!!):- Girly shopping to be curtailed. Social nights out to be reviewed carefully. Holiday expenses to be monitored closely. Use of car is another point to be reviewed. I'm not saying compromise on your right to own a car, but have a look at fuel expenses.
8. Likely you'll have to look at your utility bills and see what you can reduce, if any.
9. Credit Union interest rates are not the cheapest, but long term the CU could be your best friend if managed prudently.
10. St-Vincent de Paul is a good organisation and there is no shame approaching it. I used to do voluntary work there, but had my fallings out and my activities there ceased. My SVP mindset has changed since and I have nothing only good to say about its work. Talk to them please! Some day you might wish to contribute to their work.
11. While I'm basically a humorous person I always looked seriously on my debts. Don't flinch on your journey, when your debts are nearly cleared they are still not gone. I don't wish to sound like the Minister for Hardship but you've got to be cold and calm and eat much humble pie but the end result is worth it, believe me!.
12. The elephant-in-the-room is your husband's ability to help clear the debts. If you can get him to buy into the situation your possibilities increase. Also, you may feel like approaching your parents for some assistance. Mom and Dad are usually one's best friend in such a situation.
13. The over-riding position here is not to let the amount of debt to increase. Ensure the total amount owed is reduced each week and use this as an influence to keep you focused on the objective (i.e. to eventually become debt free).
 
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Leper makes some great points. The problem with debt is you can feel like you’re drowning in it and it’s never ending. You just need to break the cycle

Mabs is a excellent organisation though like most are under pressure but their website is definitely worth a look and probably no harm booking an appointment… they may come up with a low interest solution quickly.

And SVP - please don’t struggle day to day. They’re there to help.. anyone who genuinely needs their help will be looked after. Even if it’s short term to fill the fridge a couple of times or help with a utility bill. Will give you time to breathe

You’ve made the first step… I’m sure writing this post was difficult. Now it’s time to follow through and once and for all get help either here or mabs/svp or all avenues!
 
Definitely go to MABS. You'll get helpful real world advice and they can approach creditors on your behalf in some circumstances.

I would disagree slightly with Leper. You will probably find that the aib loan is a far lower interest rate than the credit card and store card. It might make sense to take one last topup from aib and use it strictly to clear the cards.
 
Clodagh said:
My husband has a good job and pays mortgage ets from his account but what’s happening is because I am so broke, I'm dipping in to his account just for food etc and now both of us are completely struggling!!
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No offence intended, but this reads very oddly to me. "His" account? Surely it's "your" combined household account? Or does this hint at him maybe being kept in the dark about the debt issues?. Anyway, as mentioned already, you probably really need to do a Money Makeover post and follow some of the suggestions already posted (especially about budgeting and tracking expenditure).
 
Your immediate problem seems to be more a cash-flow issue as the debt, if stubborn, isn't huge. I'd agree with Right Winger that one last top up to clear the cards could make sense IF you are determined to then give up the cards. I can't fathom separate finances for married couples, but I know it works for many people . . in your case I would suggest you need to lay the situation bare for your husband and you should tackle it together.
 
DannyBoyD said:
Its not clear if you are in paid employment; if not, is that an option for you?
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The thread is sensitive and I understand why somebody won't supply all information for fear of recognition etc.

Many married couples have separate bank accounts and I have no issue with this. My advice to our daughters were to be always independent financially no matter what the occupation of the husbands. Our son has received the same pep talk from us. And they have Joint Accounts too for family stuff. Every participant in any relationship needs some kind of financial independence. Otherwise, we might as well return to the 1950's. No offence meant to anybody - it's just my opinion.
[Independent bank accounts to each person in a relationship deserves a thread of its own]
 
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Given the way your finances are structured, it might be worth doing a full tax review to see are you claiming for all of your credits and likewise is there anything you can claim back from previous years. Assuming both of you are in PAYE paying jobs and haven't done any nixers, you shouldn't be afraid of doing this. There are companies who will do the return for you for a cut of any rebate
 
Leper said:
thread is sensitive and I understand why somebody won't supply all information for fear of recognition
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not sure I understand your concern here with my question on paid employment; I made no comment on bank accounts.

The quickest path to clearing debt is twofold, increase income & reduce outgoings.

If paid employment is an option, that's the first port of call.

If not, can they take in language students/ rent a room / ukrainian lodger.
 
Hi, Check out a guy on YouTube called Dave Ramsey. He is a very good motivator (and entertaining) when it comes to debt reduction.
If you follow/stick to his baby steps then I guarantee you will get out of your debt problem and probably never get into debt again.

I notice that you say "I have debt" and "I can't make ends meet" but you also say you are married. When married there should be no "i" when it comes to finances. It should be "we" . But this does not absolve you of personal responsibility. Stop using credit and store cards, Just stop. When in a hole stop digging. Borrowing more money is not the answer.
 
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Laughahalla said:
Hi, Check out a guy on YouTube called Dave Ramsey. He is a very good motivator (and entertaining) when it comes to debt reduction.
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The steps required to deal with debt/finances are simple (but not necessarily easy) and well documented and don't need a guru to impart them.
 
ClubMan said:
The steps required to deal with debt/finances are simple (but not necessarily easy) and well documented and don't need a guru to impart them.
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I can speak from personal experience. This "guru" helped me. As said above, a varied communication style can be a good thing.
 
In my days as an unpaid trade union official and voluntary credit union clerk I came across some people with debts that (to them) were unrepayable without the mindset of really willing to repay. No such journey is easy and feeling isolated and inept are hidden problems. Mind you I was dealing with people who had "loans" from unofficial and unregistered money lenders. Some of these "moneylenders" were professional people in their day time employment (I bet some are looking in with wide open mouths now).

These "moneylenders" ensure the victim is kept in debt with continuous top-up loans and mostly without any repayment book. The victim feels trapped and feels nobody else is there to help and much faith remains entrusted to illegal operators who charge unbelieveable high interest rates. I can let the reader know that I came under some pressure from these illegal professional operators and because of my involvement in CU/TU activity received threats and intimidation which I'm not going to go into here. It took some written statements to the Gardaí to get the situation curtailed.

I don't care if you use a "guru" or a Credit Union or Mom and Dad or a bank to get control of your finances - the main thing is to remember there are good people there who are always willing to help. Avoid the cancers that are illegal moneylenders.
 
Clodagh said:
Hi all,

Please excuse the long post in advance.

I have found myself in a situation where I am struggling with debt repayment beyond belief.

My current position is we have a mortgage which is fully up to date and never missed a payment. With regards to me personally then, I have a loan with AIB that I must have for 10 years now. It was for 10k initially, and was working away at paying it and then started struggling so with 2 clicks of the mouse on the AIB app I could top up my loan and have money in my account within 5 mins. So all these years later and after multiple top ups just to make ends meet I now still owe 9k. My repayments are €245 per month, I have a credit cards which I owe 1k, a credit union loan of €900 and a store card of €300 so all in all I pay over €400 per month on loan repayments alone.

I used to be able to scrape by but since before Christmas I just cannot make ends meet. I have literally no money for food electricity etc for 2 weeks of every month. My husband has a good job and pays mortgage ets from his account but what’s happening is because I am so broke, I'm dipping in to his account just for food etc and now both of us are completely struggling!!

I just don’t know where to turn!! Would the bank consider maybe an interest only option for a couple of years and allow us use that money to get rid of my debt??

Thank you for your time!
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To add to others you will get through this.
Try a snowballing tool where you get your budget put the minimum in you have to pay and the tool will help you decide how to reduce the debt either by high interest rate or by amount. What’s the cost site has the tool. Put in your disposable income and your debts. It will work out hiw Quick you can clear off the debt.
Moneysavingsexpert uk is great. It is uk based but same principle as mabs. There are tools there to help you reduce your debt. If you have things to sell then do this. Every penny counts.
Definately remove the option to top up your aib loan. Cut up the the credit cards and definitely the store card. Work on the highest interest first. You can do it.
 
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