In limbo re. outstanding mortgage & arrears

[Shindig]

Hi all,
I posted on here about 3/4 years ago about handing the keys back to the bank. A bit of background information:
- I'm a single mum, with 3 kids (5, 7 & 9).
- I'm not working at present. I just finished 3rd year (hopefully) in college yesterday.
- I'm in receipt of BTEA and also receive some maintenace from ex.
- Mortgage currently is 320K approx with arrears of 77K.

2006: husband left when youngest was born. We were building our family home at the time and our kids & I moved in there, in Dec 2006. Ex moved to England (English born). Where he's living at present is unknown but I think possible Australia.

2007: Last mortgage payment was made in May of this year. We got divorced (married in Australia) in July. Late that year I started Ancillary Relief proceedings against him which took place in the English courts.

2008: In January was the last time he visited the kids. He got declared bankrupt in England. I got a great result in the courts for maintenance but I will never see that money from him.

2009 - present: We continued living in our home. No mortgage has been paid since May 2007, but I have kept up the payments on the life assurance on the mortgage and the house insurance.

Recently, I have being getting phone calls from the bank basically telling me to get legal advice on what to do about the mortgage, getting a valuation on our home and the possibility of reducing the life assurance policy which is approx 225 per month & the house insurance is approx 60 per month.

I am never going to be able to pay back this amount to the bank but my family are putting a bit of pressure on me to stop paying the life assurance policy on the house and possibly hand the keys back to the bank, which I'm seriously considering.

I want to be able to continue on in my studies to get my honours degree but am going to take a year out so that I can get the house sorted as it has been a noose around my neck for the past 5.5 years. I feel that if I hand back the keys then the bank will need to start proceedings and hopefully get things sorted within the year so I can continue on without half the stress I've been under lately.

Also, on the joint account with this same bank there was an overdraft of 3000. My ex organised for this O/D and when it was authorised, he then took a lot of money out of the account from ATM's in England. In March there was a judgement put on the mortgage for the O/D, plus interest and cost which have totally up to 10,000 approx. I have since received a letter from the bank's solicitors that this has now been sent to the local sheriff, whom I'm waiting to hear from.

We have the possibly of house to live in, if we do decide to move out of here which is just down the road from us and the rent would be managable, plus as the new house is much smaller than here, the heating and electricity costs would be much lower.

Apologies for the long post, but I wanted to get as much information as possible in here.

Has anybody got any advice, feedback, help.... anything is so appreciated right now to get us out of this living nightmare.

Thanks in advance

 

[oldnick]

Forgive the patronising tone of the following .Not meant -am trying to push you into seeing the positive sides.

The bad personal news re your husband is most depressing but....
....you are young, in good health, have three nice kids ,are completing third-level education and have lived five years free in a newish large house.

The bank have been amazingly patient if they have not put much pressure on you until recently. I doubt that they will go after you for the money- a single incomeless mother-of-three -as they know they'll never get a penny -you can never pay off 400.000 Euros that you owe on a house worth, what?, 200K?
The only thing they'll do is to start moves to repossess the property- and even that'll take ages- they'll make noises about paying off the loan/debt but they'll just be noises.

The correct thing is to hand back the keys and move down the road. The bank has been exceptionally patient and probably you could stay another year without paying a cent before legal proceedings get you out.
But waiting for the bank to take action -even though it will mean another year living without costs - will mean further hassle and pressure for you. And, even though one feels sorry for your recent past history, you have had many years living at a very low cost.
That's far better than how many people are living over the last few years.

Go to your lawyer, go to the bank, move out and move on.