S
slimJim3600
Guest
Horse walks into a pub and the barman says whats with the long face.
N
ninsaga
Guest
Ninsaga logs into AAM
Ninsaga logs into AAM & says 'hey - what's with these crummy jokes!' :rollin
Ninsaga logs into AAM & says 'hey - what's with these crummy jokes!' :rollin
S
slimJim3600
Guest
Re: Ninsaga logs into AAM
ninsaga i dont write the jokes, but there are good and bad ones.
slim
ninsaga i dont write the jokes, but there are good and bad ones.
slim
J
Joe Nonety
Guest
Re: Ninsaga logs into AAM
A bear walks into the pub with a bandage on its arm and says
"I'm looking for the man who shot my paw"
A bear walks into the pub with a bandage on its arm and says
"I'm looking for the man who shot my paw"
S
slimJim3600
Guest
Re: Ninsaga logs into AAM
Joe i love it
keep it up
Joe i love it
keep it up
D
Daffy
Guest
A seal walks into a pub and the barman says "what are you having"
"Anything but a Canadian club," says the seal.
"Anything but a Canadian club," says the seal.
P
penang
Guest
A termite walks into a pub and says " Is the bar tender here?"
A
Alan Moore
Guest
I couldn't resist
two elephants walk off a cliff
boom boom
two elephants walk off a cliff
boom boom
Re: I couldn't resist
This squirrel had spent the whole day drinking when the barman eventually told him that he'd had enough and should go home. So the squirrel staggered out the door only to reappear half an hour later. "What brings you back?", exclaimed the barman*. "I'm locked out of me tree", replied the squirrel. How we all laughed...
(* Disclaimer: sorry - I simply read too many Enid Blyton books when I was young
).
This squirrel had spent the whole day drinking when the barman eventually told him that he'd had enough and should go home. So the squirrel staggered out the door only to reappear half an hour later. "What brings you back?", exclaimed the barman*. "I'm locked out of me tree", replied the squirrel. How we all laughed...
(* Disclaimer: sorry - I simply read too many Enid Blyton books when I was young
).Re: I couldn't resist
A man suffering from really bad piles returned to his doctor with a half finished packet of suppositories and complained "for all the good these XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX you gave me are doing I may as well be shoving them up me This post will be deleted if not edited to remove bad language!"
A man suffering from really bad piles returned to his doctor with a half finished packet of suppositories and complained "for all the good these XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX you gave me are doing I may as well be shoving them up me This post will be deleted if not edited to remove bad language!"
D
DCU
Guest
dyslexic
This dyslexic drunk walked into a bra
ER.... I don't get it. He walked into an arb? What's an dra or maybe an arb?
Graduate of DCU - UCD for dyslexics :lol
This dyslexic drunk walked into a bra
ER.... I don't get it. He walked into an arb? What's an dra or maybe an arb?
Graduate of DCU - UCD for dyslexics :lol
M
MOB
Guest
Re: dyslexic
A Rabbit went into a pub and ordered a pint and a cheese toastie. then he ordered another pint and a ham toastie; then another pint and a lettuce and onion toastie; then he keeled over and died, so they buried him out the back.
Next evening, his ghost appeared and the barman hastened to assure the ghost that it could not have been their beer which killed him, that they cleaned the lines regularly and ran a good house. "I know what killed me" says the rabbit. "whats that?" says the barman;
says the rabbit (This is cringe inducing, but I've gone this far):
"I died from Mixin me toasties"
A Rabbit went into a pub and ordered a pint and a cheese toastie. then he ordered another pint and a ham toastie; then another pint and a lettuce and onion toastie; then he keeled over and died, so they buried him out the back.
Next evening, his ghost appeared and the barman hastened to assure the ghost that it could not have been their beer which killed him, that they cleaned the lines regularly and ran a good house. "I know what killed me" says the rabbit. "whats that?" says the barman;
says the rabbit (This is cringe inducing, but I've gone this far):
"I died from Mixin me toasties"
L
Ludraman
Guest
A man walks into a restaurant......
...........and says, "I'll have your steak and kideley pie".
The waiter replies, "surely, you mean steak and kidney sir?".
The man replies, "that's what I said, didel I ?".
...........and says, "I'll have your steak and kideley pie".
The waiter replies, "surely, you mean steak and kidney sir?".
The man replies, "that's what I said, didel I ?".
P
penang
Guest
Re: dyslexic
....or the dyslexic bloke who went to the toga party dressed as a goat..........
....or the dyslexic bloke who went to the toga party dressed as a goat..........
S
saver
Guest
Re: dyslexic
An then, of course, there are all the poor dyslexic kids who were trying to send letters to him at Christmas. They're paying dearly now!
saver
An then, of course, there are all the poor dyslexic kids who were trying to send letters to him at Christmas. They're paying dearly now!
saver
M
MichaelL
Guest
Woman wallks into a bar
.............. asks the barman for a Double entendre,
so he gives her one
.............. asks the barman for a Double entendre,
so he gives her one
B
Blonde
Guest
One for the girls
A woman was sitting in a bar enjoying a cocktail after work when the most gorgeous hunk of a man she had ever seen entered.
He was tall and handsome, with dark hair and green eyes.
The man noticed that he was the object of the woman’s rapt attention, and with a sly, sexy smile, approached her. Blushing, she prepared to apologise for staring but he leaned close and whispered in her ear.
“I’ll do anything,” he whispered in a deep, soft voice. “Anything, absolutely anything you want, anything you have ever fantasised, for £50. There’s just one condition...”
Trembling with anticipation, the woman asked him the condition.
The man said, “You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words.”
The women gazed into his hypnotic eyes, considering the proposition, then reached into her handbag and took out £50.
She scribbled her address on a napkin, folded it around the cash, and pressed it into his waiting hand. She leaned over and whispered into his ear...
“Clean...my...house.”
A woman was sitting in a bar enjoying a cocktail after work when the most gorgeous hunk of a man she had ever seen entered.
He was tall and handsome, with dark hair and green eyes.
The man noticed that he was the object of the woman’s rapt attention, and with a sly, sexy smile, approached her. Blushing, she prepared to apologise for staring but he leaned close and whispered in her ear.
“I’ll do anything,” he whispered in a deep, soft voice. “Anything, absolutely anything you want, anything you have ever fantasised, for £50. There’s just one condition...”
Trembling with anticipation, the woman asked him the condition.
The man said, “You have to tell me what you want me to do in just three words.”
The women gazed into his hypnotic eyes, considering the proposition, then reached into her handbag and took out £50.
She scribbled her address on a napkin, folded it around the cash, and pressed it into his waiting hand. She leaned over and whispered into his ear...
“Clean...my...house.”
J
Jamie and his magic torch
Guest
dyslexic
What is DNA an acronym for?
National Dyslexia Association
Did you hear about the dyslexic pimp?
He set up a warehouse.
What is DNA an acronym for?
National Dyslexia Association
Did you hear about the dyslexic pimp?
He set up a warehouse.