or else send them off renting for a while, paying their own bills and doing their own cooking etc. That'll soon learn them.!
Oh how I would have loved to be able to do that. And as soon as it was possible, I did, choosing to study languages and telling my parents it was a college requirement that I spent summers in Germany. I was thrilled when I got my first proper job (back in Ireland) that it was too far away to make living with my parents practical.
Well IMO, if there is any young adult who is earning a reasonable amount of money and is unwilling to pitch in to the household exps without "resenting" their parents, then they need a good kick up the @rse
Sorry, if there's supposed to be humour in your post, I don't see it. I'm just trying to point out that it is not always as simple as "make them hand over money, it'll build character". That's exactly what my stepmother always used to say. She was also fond of reminding us that that was the
only reason she took money from us because she actually had more than enough money already for everything and the money from us didn't actually mean anything. 'Cos it was just to build character, you know. Given that I did my best to never ask for money, even for things that my parents would have paid for (monthly bus tickets, books for college and so on), I'm still not sure what telling me that the money I was handing over was meaningless and that it was all for my own good was supposed to achieve. I remember as a kid seeing my older sisters, who had left school and were working full-time by then, putting their housekeeping money into a big piggybank that was in the kitchen for that purpose. I don't remember that the money was ever used for anything but general housekeeping and I do remember my mum occasionally opening it up and being glad to have the money already there to use when she headed off to the supermarket. So I saw the money being put to an actual use and was fully aware of the importance of everyone who was earning to contribute. There was a definite difference between that and a few years later when us younger ones had to go cash in hand once a week and personally hand over money that we were consistently told had no meaning for the household and was to build character for us.
I know my dysfunctional family background might not be the typical set-up (although it might not be as uncommon as many would like to think) but I am just trying to make the point that a black and white "kids hand over money, it's good for them" and "parents are always right" is not always the reality. And that putting a bit of thought going into how and what for might not be a bad idea.