Child Maintenace query

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aoc

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Separated about 6 months ago. we at the moment split all costs for our 1 child. we have agreed an amount to be paid every week.... now ex has come back saying that I earn more than him so does he have to pay me any maintenance?

We 'share' custody 3 nights one week, 4 another... tho i do seem to have child 5 nights a lot of weeks (not a complaint obviously would love the 7 nights!)..
 
i suppose that's what i am asking....

i am going to be living in family home, paying mortgage, bills etc and i organise all child's expenses clothes etc then we split child's expenses in half?
I suppose i had assumed that as i was going to live in the house and maintain all the costs that i would get maintenance.....
sorry, obviously all new to this and trying to sort out my finances...
 
ok.... obviously i see where you are coming from.

its not really about costs for house etc, i suppose i was thinking about costs for child - clothes, extra curricular activities etc...
i'm not in this for what i can get, its stressful enough tho amicable... just would like to sort it...
 
The costs for the child should be split, is he not splitting the cost?

It is stressful, and you're going to have to deal with him for years to come so if its amicable try keep it that way.. It does get easier with time..
 
had looked at that already... i'm very confused about it to be honest.

Now that chrisboy has mentioned should i not pay maintenance i am getting more worried, its hard enough to cover all costs.

We do split all costs, but i find it degrading to have to ask for the money so i thought if we just agreed a figure and he paid it to me every week or whatever that it would resolve it for both parties...

oh trying to be amicable.. tho obviously it is hard all the time.
 
Would it not be a good idea to set up a central account for the child into which you both pay for annual expenses? These would include school books, uniforms, doctor's visits, christmas etc, etc. Agree a set amount between yourselves.

Seeing as you are sharing custody/access and you are the higher earner that would seem to be the fairest. Agree that you will both shoulder the responsibility for all other child-related costs when the child is in your care.
 
aoc said:
its not really about costs for house etc,...
Click to expand...

But it is about those costs too. Your housing costs and heating bills etc are to house and provide heat and food for you and the child, and his housing costs and heating bills are to house and provide heat and food for him and the child. Being amicable where a child is involved is about everyone being a winner and living in the best circumstances for everybody and where one earns more than the other than they have to pay more.

It is not degrading to ask for money in the circumstances you've outlined. Two adults should sit down, put all the figures on paper (income and expenditure) and decide how to go forward. You don't even have to be separted people to need to do this.
 
also .... if you are remaining in the family home whose names are on the mortgage?

If his name is on it jointly with yours then he has a responsibilty to ensure that the mortgage is paid also.

You need to get issues like these sorted early as they could come back to bite you later on. What if you pay morgage for the foreseeable future and he comes back for his share of the family home?
 
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