Boss asking if I was pregnant!

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I can think of a few occasions over the years when I was asked this by my boss when I wasn't drinking or didn't want a pint after work - it's said in a jesting way but there's also a serious note to it. I have to say it doesn't bother me in the slightest. In fact, I tend to wind him up and pretend that I am. If the guy had come to you in work and said 'are you pregnant' then I would be a bit more upset, but if it's in a social setting and was just idle banter then I wouldn't worry about it and I certainly wouldn't make a big deal about it. It's all just a bit too PC for me - just my opinion :)
 
ney001 said:
I can think of a few occasions over the years when I was asked this by my boss when I wasn't drinking or didn't want a pint after work - it's said in a jesting way but there's also a serious note to it. I have to say it doesn't bother me in the slightest. In fact, I tend to wind him up and pretend that I am. If the guy had come to you in work and said 'are you pregnant' then I would be a bit more upset, but if it's in a social setting and was just idle banter then I wouldn't worry about it and I certainly wouldn't make a big deal about it. It's all just a bit too PC for me - just my opinion :)
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Be careful of someone will insinuate that you are elitist and seeking to exploit people...
 
I understand why the OP found it uncomfortable and she why reacted initially as she did - she was caught off-guard.

Personally it would bother me even if a member of my family asked me the same question - it's a very personal topic.

It would definitely bug me if a work colleague asked me. Having said that I wouldn't formally complain, but I would let them know that I thought it inappropriate.
 
Hi Purple,

As an employer too I fully echo your sentiments of striving to create a harmonious workplace.


I have been asked similiar personal questions by my staff over the years on nights out and indeed on the job too... Can I sue them???
 
Armada said:
I have been asked similiar personal questions by my staff over the years on nights out and indeed on the job too... Can I sue them???
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The question at the heart of this thread is as inappropriate when posed by an employee to an employer or manager as it is if posed the other way in my opinion. Neither the original poster nor anybody offering any constructive advice mentioned anything about suing anybody. That issue was raised by some people poo-poohing the idea that the question might be inappropriate and inferring that any sort of querying of it is a gross overreaction by namby-pamby PC ridden employees... :rolleyes:
 
My employers are doing a survey asking everyone about disabilities etc. You must put your name down.
I wonder if the boss asked everybody on the night out if they were pregnant would he be covered?
 
ClubMan said:
The question at the heart of this thread is as inappropriate when posed by an employee to an employer or manager as it is if posed the other way in my opinion. Neither the original poster nor anybody offering any constructive advice mentioned anything about suing anybody. That issue was raised by some people poo-poohing the idea that the question might be inappropriate and inferring that any sort of querying of it is a gross overreaction by namby-pamby PC ridden employees... :rolleyes:
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The OP asked if it was against equality legislation and another poster advised that the OP keep the details in their diary. You advised that the OP should approach HR with the issue. I do not understand why a question asked in a social setting away from work would warrant such a reaction. You are obviously of a more legalistic mindset than I and we will have to agree to differ.
I still resent the insinuation in you last response to my post.
 
Ok.. Point taken Clubman..

But it still seems to me to be a little OTT to be discussing this on an internet forum. If the employee is that genuinely upset perhaps it would be better to discuss it with her employer or to have voiced her grievance at that time.

I bet her employer would prefer to really know how sensitive his employee is for future reference. I would hate to think that my employees would turn to a message board for advice... that said I always try not to cross the line on personal issues.
 
Purely from the point of view of manners, it is not polite to ask someone if they are expecting - even if it seems glaringly obvious to you that they are.

If a woman wants you to know, she'll tell you; if she's excited about it, she'll tell the whole country! :)

Otherwise myob.
 
Clubman, could my employer ask everybody say twice a yeah if they were pregnant? Its seems just as fair as asking if I have a disability
 
Purple said:
You advised that the OP should approach HR with the issue.
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No I didn't. Try reading my post again.
ClubMan said:
How big is the company? Maybe you should consider dealing with the issue via HR if applicable and if you don't feel comfortable dealing with it face to face. Again I am not recommending this and reckon that a quiet word face to face probably could well be the most appropriate way the way to deal with this. But a lot depends on the two parties dealing with this honestly and maturely which may not always be possible!
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I still resent the insinuation in you last response to my post.
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What are you on about?

Armada said:
But it still seems to me to be a little OTT to be discussing this on an internet forum. If the employee is that genuinely upset perhaps it would be better to discuss it with her employer or to have voiced her grievance at that time.
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They were looking for feedback. That's what such forums are for.
 
davidoco said:
Clubman, could my employer ask everybody say twice a yeah if they were pregnant? Its seems just as fair as asking if I have a disability
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AFAIK, an employer can not ask if anyone is pregnant....the employee must advise the employer 4 weeks before maternity leave, but I don't think the employer can ask as a routine question (I think there may be an exception if the person works in an environment which could be hazzardous to the person/child). Some people say nothing to work until they are 6 or 7 months pregnant.
 
ClubMan said:
Damn inconvenient when the serfs actually have the cheek to query, understand and maybe enforce their statutory employment rights, don't you agree old bean? Sites such as this should obviously be banned:

[broken link removed]
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No, I don't agree. I think that everyone is entitled to be treated with respect and comments should be taken in context. If everyone lived by the letter of the law employees would be fired more often and employers would be sued much more often.
The era of doffing you cap to anyone, employer, churchman or local squire are long gone and I would much rather work in an environment were my employee tells me to get lost and mind my own business if I overstep the mark than work in one where I could not have a personal relationship with the people I spend my working day with.
I would also rather work in one where people can be helped through personal problems without having to refer to their contract to see if there is some way of avoiding giving them that help.

...but you seem to disagree.

edit: re-posting after editing due to self edited bad language. :confused:
 
Completely off topic I suppose Clubman... but I 'd love to know is the OP looking for advice during her working hours?
 
ClubMan said:
Why the confused emoticon? You clearly breached posting guideline 10 first time around (and not for the first time!) so your post was removed.


Posted slightly tongue in cheekily.
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The insinuation was still there, might be a bit close to attacking the person and not the point? Posting guideline 10 perhaps?
 
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