bullwinkle
Registered User
- Messages
- 31
Hi
probably the wrong forum but I cannot access the Depths which I normally read. I have a bit of an issue that has been coming to a head for a few months now.
My husband was unemployed for a long period of time. He then got a job with a very very close friend of mine. Initially everything was great then it became apparent to me that he didn't like the job at all, it was something that he had to retrain for. Essentially he came from being a boss to being the lowest man on the totem. To be honest I didn't really care whether he liked it or not as we needed the money and still do - we have a large mortgage and debt, I already work 6 days a week and don't have any more hours in the day.
Anyway, it seems that although he has stuck the job out, he has been putting in the bare minimum of effort, leaving early, standing around etc. Anyway friend didn't want to say anything to me but it was causing tension and eventually they told me - apparently it's been going on for months. My friend called my husband in for a chat last week trying to get him to see that he needs this job but apparently by husband reacted very badly - blaming everybody else etc and now there is a big stand off. So, my dilemma is now that he is hurting my friends business so I think he'll have to hand in his notice as he was good enough to help us out when we needed it. However - it doesn't end at that does it? we will badly suffer financially and also our relationship is going to suffer. I am working like a dog to support us and pay our bills and debts, I always thought we were a team, now it seems that I am on my own and he will be happy enough to let me carry us - I don't know if our relationship could survive it.
Of course the other issue is just the disappointment and embarrassment of knowing that my husband is that guy who doesn't pull his weight. I spoke to him months ago about how he needs to just suck it up and get on with it and thought that was an end to it. I haven't told him yet that I know about last weeks meeting and all the other issues - he'll probably go nuts that I even know and blame my friend for telling me etc.
I'd really welcome any advice anyone could give to me - I'm afraid of either option at the moment.
probably the wrong forum but I cannot access the Depths which I normally read. I have a bit of an issue that has been coming to a head for a few months now.
My husband was unemployed for a long period of time. He then got a job with a very very close friend of mine. Initially everything was great then it became apparent to me that he didn't like the job at all, it was something that he had to retrain for. Essentially he came from being a boss to being the lowest man on the totem. To be honest I didn't really care whether he liked it or not as we needed the money and still do - we have a large mortgage and debt, I already work 6 days a week and don't have any more hours in the day.
Anyway, it seems that although he has stuck the job out, he has been putting in the bare minimum of effort, leaving early, standing around etc. Anyway friend didn't want to say anything to me but it was causing tension and eventually they told me - apparently it's been going on for months. My friend called my husband in for a chat last week trying to get him to see that he needs this job but apparently by husband reacted very badly - blaming everybody else etc and now there is a big stand off. So, my dilemma is now that he is hurting my friends business so I think he'll have to hand in his notice as he was good enough to help us out when we needed it. However - it doesn't end at that does it? we will badly suffer financially and also our relationship is going to suffer. I am working like a dog to support us and pay our bills and debts, I always thought we were a team, now it seems that I am on my own and he will be happy enough to let me carry us - I don't know if our relationship could survive it.
Of course the other issue is just the disappointment and embarrassment of knowing that my husband is that guy who doesn't pull his weight. I spoke to him months ago about how he needs to just suck it up and get on with it and thought that was an end to it. I haven't told him yet that I know about last weeks meeting and all the other issues - he'll probably go nuts that I even know and blame my friend for telling me etc.
I'd really welcome any advice anyone could give to me - I'm afraid of either option at the moment.