Hi, sorry to hear this is so stressful but no need to shoot the messenger, you did seek feedback. Brendan's advice is quite reasonable and fair.
I took a quick look at the gross vs net salary. €58,650 based on the info provided (married, one earner, 3 kids) usually equates to 3,650 per month take home. Are there other deductions from your salary or how come your take home is €3,250 - something not making sense here to me. Also childcare allowance, TRS, etc.
It does seem that the Bank have been pretty fair and accommodating, extending the period for reduced payment, etc. There is only so long that can continue. Your costs, and particularly paying €445 per month to in effect retain the option on a place in a crèche - does that really make sense in the circumstances? You could seek to refinance with another Bank but that will inevitably be at a higher rate so if I was you I would absolutely want to retain the tracker. Admirable that you took out a shorter term (17 years) mortgage, unfortunately that is working against you.
My suggestion is to tighten the spending, look closely at the childcare costs, other costs and put a proposal to them, offering a higher payment per month. Unrealistic to expect the Bank to continue for the medium term accepting 195 per month.
I have been through the FSO process on something so I think based on my reading of above you are most likely wasting your time and just going to get more frustrated and stressed. Better to use your energy to look at how you can solve the problem, consider options, etc. Good luck!