Hi all,
I am a frequent poster on AAM, but I need to keep this separate from my normal profile.
My partners background:
I am a frequent poster on AAM, but I need to keep this separate from my normal profile.
My partners background:
- She has a teenage child who lives full time with her. Father sees the child once every three months or so and does not wish to be involved in her life even though he was encouraged to do so.
- There is a little dog living in the house
- Ex-husband has not stood in the house since 2010 nor paid anything towards the mortgage since then despite bank communication, etc.
- He had to be dragged to court a few times to pay a small amount of maintenance for his child
- Ex-husband sought a foreign divorce, they both have dual nationality, and this concluded in 2012. Their relationship is rather acrimonious and he has bad blood towards her and tries to frustrate / bully her at every opportunity... but his hold over her is continually reducing.
- Ex-husband has a bad habit of showing up on occasion every couple of months without prior notice to see the child - this doesn't help his relationship with his child. Rational dicussion around this point was not fruitful
- A judicial separation was applied for, but since the foreign divorce was granted, this judicial separation is now being changed to an application for "Reliefs following a foreign divorce". This will get a judicial decision on house, mortgage, maintenance and custody.
- House has a mortgage and is in slight negative equity. This does not pose a concern for me due to the levels involved. Ideal situation would be for the judicial separation to get his name off the mortgage.
- He has had several relationships during (cause of marriage breakdown) and since the end of the marriage but he is not officially aware of my presence.
- I wish to spend more time with the mother and teenager. We have been together for two years and I have frequently stayed with them but this is the next step forward.
- I wish to spend some money creating a bedroom for us (house is lovely but no bedroom for us due to a couple of simple reasons) and there is essentially a spare empty room. I am aware that there may be a situation where the house will be sold in the future, but I am willing to sink this cost.
- I will maintain my own rented accomodation so this is my centre of interest. If she is asked in the course of the judicial separation she will not have to lie about my official registered address.
- We just want to get on with our lives, there is no malice or deceit planned against the ex-husband.
- Ideally we would like to secure the house in her/our names and go forward on that basis but I will go and buy a house if necessary
- I believe I read somewhere that the husband cannot reenter the house now that they are divorced? Can someone please point me to a link on this?
- In what ways can my presence in the household negatively impact the judicial separation? Given that I am essentially a visitor and 'we don't know what the future holds for us', even though we have the intention in the future
- My concern is where do I stand if, for example, I am in the house or arriving to the house on my own and I meet him at the door. Legally I guess there can be nothing he can do to prevent my presence? Who is to say what I'm doing there, and again I have my own official residence... I could see this scenario, for example, where I was minding the dog and the house for two days on my own... I could see some sort of a standoff occuring and it's not clear.
- If there anything I should be aware about, from a legal perspective, about minding the house and the teenager without the mother being present? Is there any challenges he can bring in court about this? My concern is not about minding the child, I've done that many times.
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