there would be war
Welcome to rural Ireland. What should happen and what does or will happen are completely different. These matters have been the cause of so much division, argument and indeed bloodshed over the years in so many families.I don't really get this as a non-farmer and as a woman. If a son is working on the family farm then he should get a proper salary for doing that. He shouldn't have total rights to the land and the house after the father dies. I suspect any daughters can go whistle as well.
It's outrageously unfair to the other children.
Tell your father he is prioritising the farm over the family relationships.
Ask your father if he wants his grandchildren to know their cousins and have a healthy extended family interactions?
Or does he want his children's families to hate each other in a bitter continuing family feud that stretches for generations into the future?
Because that's what he's setting up. To him 'The Farm' is more important than people
I don't really get this as a non-farmer...
But its a nightmare... I am so worried about it all - I live the other end of the country and have my own life but its still such a worry... I fear there will be blood...
Gonna get Dad to call his solicitor to get advice ASAP
Maybe, you know, they want peaceful relations in the family?And to play Devil's advocate, why are you getting involved between adults (your two brothers and you Parents) who presumably are old enough to take responsibility for themselves?
Surely it's not your responsibility to sort our their affairs?
Especially as you don't seem to be in consideration for either the house or the farm.
Often solved by gifting a site and help with the deposit to build so the non-farming child is out of the house many year before an inheritance need to be made.
The person is getting involved now to avoid trouble in the future for all the family. Sometimes it takes a non involved party to act as an intermediary and make people see sense. It is a thankless task but the recent tragic event in North Cork showed how people can resort to extreme measures in such cases. This matter could be addressed by meeting individually with all the parties to see what their expectation and indeed compromise might be. What is the cause of the disagreement between the two brothers? Is it substantial or just typical rural pigheadedness? Highlight in a common letter the terrible outcomes of such disputes over the years. Of course if you are not getting cooperation it might be time to walk away from the lotAnd to play Devil's advocate, why are you getting involved between adults (your two brothers and you Parents) who presumably are old enough to take responsibility for themselves?
Surely it's not your responsibility to sort our their affairs?
Especially as you don't seem to be in consideration for either the house or the farm.
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