K
Have you checked the budgeting and debt management resources in the key posts threads linked at the top of this forum?KarlK said:I have come to the conclusion that I am totally incapable of managing money.
I remember somebody mentioning some crowd who provide this sort of service but they also charged a pretty penny for it. Unfortunately I can't find the thread in question right now.Is it possible to get someone else to manage my money for me? I would give them my salary and they would pay the bills and give me an allowance. I earned about 90K last year.
Have you ever tried using a spending diary to log where the money goes and then reviewing this after a few weeks to see what cutbacks can be made? Unless you have significant debts or other unavoidable outgoings or a really lavish lifestyle there is no reason that you should be finding things difficult on an income of €90K in my opinion. I don't think that you're an idiot but I do think that you need to take a hard objective look at where your money is going and what you are doing wrong.I think I have a psychological problem with money. Does anyone have any advice rather than just telling me I'm an idiot which I know already?
If you do decide that this might be a useful option then I personally would recommend that you at least check out CBT (alone or with a suitably trained CBT practitioner/therapist) instead of some of the other more general (and arguably loosely defined/focused) branches of psychology/counselling. In my opinion it's a lot more practical and logical than some of the alternatives. But it does take work on the part of the participant to work. It's a very useful way of uncovering, understanding and changing behaviours and habits that are based on faulty assumptions or perceptions.Janet said:You might also consider seeing a psychologist to try and get to the bottom of why you have problems with spending - however only you can really decide if this would be a help.
I think this is a very good point.Thrifty said:I think what you may have now is this idea that you can't handle money and you're probably setting yourself up to fail before you even start. Handling money is not a talent its something you learn.
Sounds like you have a reasonably good idea of what is causing your problems. You just need the willpower to make the hard decisons. Try looking your child in the eye and telling her that you frittered away his/her future on takeaways and LCD tellys.KarlK said:Why cook when you can order in? Why hang out the clothes when you can use the drier? Why fix when you can buy a new one? This pattern leads to a lower standard of living and also a lack of creativity.
KarlK said:I had thought that CBT might help but I haven't searched for any practitioner yet. I imagine my problems are the result of bad habits. In psychoanalytic terms, I may be too financially generous with other people in an attempt to make them like me. I don't have much faith in psychoanalysis and I reckon my mental health is very strong apart from this issue.
KarlK said:I think I see myself as richer than I am. When I was young I never imagined I would earn this much money and I seem to have formed a false image of myself as being well off and without the need to worry about day to day spending.
I may be in the habit of using money as an easy and unimaginative way around life's problems. Why cook when you can order in? Why hang out the clothes when you can use the drier? Why fix when you can buy a new one? This pattern leads to a lower standard of living and also a lack of creativity.
KarlK said:My wife has no relationship with money very much. She has no interest in making or saving or spending money. She is very supportive but her only suggestion is that I declare myself bankrupt.
KarlK said:I have lived beyond my means since I was a teenager. My working life has been focused around increasing my income so that I would reach a point where I couldn't overspend. This strategy has not worked even when my income was double what it is now a couple of years ago and I was seriously overworked.
You mean try MABS - again! I agree.mimi rogers said:I think you should contact MABS. They should be able to help you. From what I hear they are excellent.
Mimi
KarlK said:I have tried to budget several times and failed. I tried MABS.
I don't know my outgoings so I'm making a log which I'll post in a few weeks in this thread.ClubMan said:KarlK - maybe if you posted a summary of your income and outgoings (if you know what they are yet) here people could make suggestions? If you don't know your outgoings in detail then you will definitely need to use a spending diary/log.
I don't rent or own. I have an odd temporary arrangement where an expat friend has lent me a house in repayment for an old favour and won't accept rent. She says she'd like to move back to this house in about a year. I share a car with my wife with total running costs of about 5k/year.Are you renting at the moment - i.e. you don't own your own home?
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