There was no attempt to judge here. The fact is that you were inquiring re a holiday when you knew you had a large CC bill outstanding, so what else could one reasonably infer? Apols if your sensitivities were offended, it was not intended; I appreciate someone in your situation has a lot on their plate!
Re your CC - given what you are saying the critical thing is to get yourself off a high interest charging CC account ASAP. Talk to the bank about getting a term loan at a rate which will be much lower than the CC debt. Insist on it and play hardball if you have to, ie state you will 'refuse' to pay any more CC payments unless they help you, they need to act reasonably so they should facilitate you.
Also cut up the credit card and never use it again. The amount of people who are in this situation, who get a term loan and then use the credit card again is astounding. Switch to cash only. If necessary get a prepaid 'credit card' which means you still have the functionality of a CC, but can only use the card if you have already lodged cash to it.
You also mentioned a 'family joint account with AIB'. What's that about? Is there money it in which can partly pay down the credit card as part of an agreement to sort out your CC?
Also you are banking with two banks, it would be better to stay with one, build up a relationship and try to get on top of things such that they start to develop confidence in you. Take this as a suggestion of course, only you know why you use the two banks, maybe there is a good reason.
Sounds like you husband is back working from your earlier email so hopefully things improve. Good luck!