Bullying in school

super mam

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please help. (hope his is the right area for this post)

My child is constantly being ''Bullied'' in school by a problem child from a problem family, I've complained to the school and Teacher verbally and in writing, but nothing the school does seems to have any impact on this brat.
My child now hates going to school for fear of what this bully will say or do, and he is now getting angry and getting into trouble when he reacts to the bully.
I've tried to move my child to another school but all surrounding areas are full..
Does any one have any experience of this?
How do I go about getting this bully moved to another class,as he constantly disrupts the whole class, or can I have some sort of restraining order placed against him?

All in the intrest of my child receiving an education and reaching his full potential in a positive and peacefull autmosphere.
thanks
 
hiya....

i can relate to this... my (now) 14 yr old had this in 4th class. I was sick to my back teeth over her. Shes so soft and gentle and had a hard time from 2 girls... to the point where it got physical. I to, wrote letters and it came to the point where i took matters into my own hands - I called to the house spoke with the mother and i got "kids will be kids".

I moved her out of the school with a very firm letter of dissappointment to the school and the committee and the board of education. I was lucky enough to have another school nearby that wasnt full.

Some wont agree with me but this is my advise - keep looking for a school that will take your child. Keep scheduling meetings with the principals of the potential schools. dont give up. I`d move my child again if i had to. Its very easy us adults saying stick up for yourself and you have to fight your own battles but when it comes to hard-ass bullying no child should have to go through this. Me as a parent its my responsibility to protect my child and thats exactly what i did.

I wish you the very best of luck with it.... chin up

SS x
 
Hi Supermam

Thats awful. I can't imagine the stress this would be putting on both you and your child. I'm not sure if it is possible to get a restraining order against another child but there are some good guidelines here if the school are not dealing effectively with your complaint.

I hope this gets resolved soon.
GED
 
if you've tried the school and they won't help, have you tried contacting the bully's parents - if not give it a try and if you still get nowhere, i would schedule an older bully to have a chat with these kids - jmo
 
Thanks all and Ged thanks for the links
No chance of moving him to another school as all we tried have a 2-3 year waiting list.
No chance of going to the parents of the bully as they are have drug related problems (which is prob how thier own son is as bad as he is)
We try and teach our children right from wrong and about Actions/ reactions and consequences..... but not everyone live by these rules..
I really feel that the Bully needs to be moved to another class..... can I insist on that when I go to see the principal? Although I wonder if any of the other Teachers would want this bully in thier class...
What's the best way to resolve this and to allow my son to enjoy school again?
thanks all
 
Kids have the right to go to school and be a part of society without being bullied or threatened or interfered with.
Just because your son is a minor your schools management seem to be in denial. Just imagine if one teacher bullied another teacher in the school, assaulted him, took his lunch money etc. Your sons school is his place of work the same way the school is the teachers place of work.

If another child is threatening the wellbeing of any other child then that child should be removed from the school.
If the school wont help then the bully needs to be expelled. Not moved to another class.

If this is a serious and an ongoing thing, I'd see a solicitor and establlish your sons right legally to attend school without being in fear of his life.
The alternative is for your sons education, exam results and future to be seriously disrupted by someone who probably is much less intelligent.
 
Surely the school is failing in its duty of care towards the child in these circumstances. They could be leaving themselves open to legal action if they are doing nothing to address your complaints.
 
I was bullied as a child and believe me it does come back to haunt you when you get older. My self confidence took a serious blow. It is very important to take this bullying very seriously and move your child away from it before it has any long term effects.
 
Sounds like the school is not handling this properly at all.

Can you speak to the board of managment.
I thought schools were obliged to have an anti bullying policy ?
http://www.citizensinformation.ie/c...ine-in-schools/bullying-in-schools-in-ireland

I'll probably get slatted for this but can you coach your son in dealing with this guy. Sometimes the only way to deal with a bully is to tackle them head on.....although each case is different and it might be gone too far for that
Perhaps a few choice words from some older cousins to the bully might do the trick ???
 
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Super mam

Sorry to hear about your problem. Unfortunately this happen all the time. This sounds very like what one of my friends went through while in Secondary School. Schools did nothing much about it, Parents of the bullies just laughed it off so her parents took it one step further. They reported it to the Gardai. Called to the school and to their parents. The bullies got such a shock at the thought of having a record it all stopped. It may be something to consider.
 
Thanks all.
I've done a bit of research and I am going to address things asap.Iwill talk to the dept of education too..
My son and I were just talking about it all and I'm so hurt for him... physically so far he has been, slapped, pushed, hit, had things thrown at him in class, i.e, rulers, pens, pencils etc(thrown at his head) The bully was made apologise but things continued again. now my son is being threatned...The bully said he'd ram stuff down his throat, break his face, break his jaw, kill him, get his mates to kill him, and also there is a lot of name calling...
God writing it all down is terrible, in fact I think i'll even ring the gardai an have a talk with them too..
thanks all for your comments
forgot to say by the way, my son is 11 yrs and the bully is 12, (attitude of a 16 year old)
 
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I would assume that the school cannot exclude this pupil - as I am sure they would be only too anxious to see the back of him.Often it seems as if the rights of disruptive pupils take precedence over those of better behaved pupils - disruptive pupils cannnot be excluded because they are entitled to an education,even though they obviously have no interest in learning and are preventing others from doing so.I think it is only when parents of well-behaved children, who want to learn stand up to this system that things might change.
 
Hi,

On a quick read thru the previous posts I think you mention about getting the other child moved to another class. Is there an opportunity to have your child moved and, therefore, at least give him a bit of peace during class.
 
thanks all
I spoke to the teacher and sent a letter of complaint, The principal said the situtation was being monotered but that they were having terrible problems with that child and not much joy from his parents where there seems to be a drugs issue...I dont want to move my son to another class as I feel the bully should be moved and not the victim, up till all this started my son was a confident young man, he is liked and respected by the other kids, he is a very high achiever and excells in all he does ( prob the reason the bully targetted him in the first place) I will take advise and keep you all posted on what happens and hopefully this awful situtation will stop and my son can stop fearing going to school and wondering what HE'S going to do or say.
thanks for your advise and comments
 
Hi supermam,

Sorry to hear about your trouble. I was also bullied when I was in secondary school 11/12years old. Just like sammie110 it does come back on you.
If the school wont do anything, I would go to the gardai. This should not be accepted in this day and age.

Your young boy is probably afraid, Im thinking back to my school days now and I should of stood up to them but I didnt. The bullying only stopped after 3rd year when moved to different classes. I hope things get better soon for you.
 
you should take it upon yourself to provide family pride and confidence to your son by doing what a mum should think that she has a right to do. look after her kids. If something like that happened to my son then I would be straight in that classroom disrupting the flow, and giving a lecture indirectly about some of the consequences of bullying.
It would help if your 6 foot, 250 pd and have dreadlocks too!
 
What was the nature of the bullying? Is it verbal or physical? Does it take place in class or in the yard or both ? I would speak again to the class teacher and ask what could you as parent do to assist class teacher in solving this problem.Also speak to the principal.Work with the teachers .If the problem is continuing it may appear the teachers are not solving it but you all need to work together rather than confrontation. The school's stay safe programme deals with bullying. Familiarise yourself with this programme.Ask school for this.It deals with bullying,through role play and guidelines for pupils to follow.Bullying we all now can take place in hallways,corrodors and in the yard.It can be very difficult for teachers to monitor. Obviously your child does not want to appear to be constantly telling tales.
If the parents of the bully will not listen to you,will they listen to the teachers.Remember the bully has rights in the Ed. system.The bully cannot be suspended unless guidelines are followed,it is a major breach of discipline and even then it can only be for 3 days. As an ex principal who left the job early at 49 years of age,I was physically assualted by a pupil in the yard ,I tried to restrain him from physically assualting a younger pupil. I suspended the pupil for 3 days,as a result of my action [with the chairpersons approval] I was verbally threatened by the father of the child and verbally abused by the mother.I was threatened with legal action in suspending the pupil.
 
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