Would you allow your 17yr old go camping?

DavyJones said:
He is 17 not 12. When I was his age, I had just left home, had a part time job, drove and still had to fit in doing my leaving cert.

Ofcourse he should go, why would you not trust him?
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I am well aware of his age as I did give birth to him, and I already said I trust him but am just a worrier
 
foxylady said:
I am well aware of his age as I did give birth to him, and I already said I trust him but am just a worrier
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As I say, I do sympathise, and of course you worry. You'll always worry about your kids.
But, I think the view here is that, at 17, you can't and shouldn't be sheltering him from the big bad world.
 
Trust your instinct on this one, I suspect you really want to let him go, but are worried, that worry comes with the territory. Let him know your feelings and let him know that you are trusting him on this one. Just another brick in the trust wall !

Secman
 
Its the bold women goin' along as well that would worry me :eek:

My protective Mammy side says definitely do not let him go but his life probably wouldn't be worth living if he was the only one who was made to stay home.

I didn't let my beauty go into town for Junior Cert celebrations because there had been a lot of trouble the previous year. Needless to say because the Gardai were on their guard nothing happened and, of course, I still hear all about it to this day and he's well into his college years now.
 
Sue Ellen said:
Its the bold women goin' along as well that would worry me :eek:

My protective Mammy side says definitely do not let him go but his life probably wouldn't be worth living if he was the only one who was made to stay home.

I didn't let my beauty go into town for Junior Cert celebrations because there had been a lot of trouble the previous year. Needless to say because the Gardai were on their guard nothing happened and, of course, I still hear all about it to this day and he's well into his college years now.
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Hi Sue Ellen

I was beginning to think I was the only neurotic mammy on aam :D
 
Last edited:
Let him go.

What could he possibly get up to on a camping trip that he doesnt already have opportunity to get up to?

Drinking - he no doubt has opportunity to do that behind his parents backs if he wants to, and no doubt does indulge without your knowledge (he is 17, Id be very surprised if he hadnt tried alcohol).

Sex - again, this is something he could quite easily alreasy be doing, more important to talk to him about sexual health and safety than try to keep him out of situations where he may try it.

Drugs - see drink above.

Smoking - see above.

Other than the 3 above (the big scary things!!!), he could get up to any shenanigans with his friends that could cause the guards to be involved, joyriding, property damage etc... but its highly unlikely that if he is not already a trouble maker that one camping trip is going to turn him into one.

He may gain some very useful life experience from the excursion.

Another alternative is for a responsible but lenient adult to go with them and allow them their shenanigans but just be a safe presence.

Ultimately you cannot keep him under your watchful eye forever, and a dose of trust now at the age of 17, will do wonders for your future adult relationship with him later.
 
Teatime said:
Ah yeah let him go. Clamp down on him now and he'll rebel later.

I cycled from Galway to Kerry with 2 mates when I was 16. Planned to stay in hostels each night. Missed the ferry at Killimor on Day 3 and ended up sleeping in a hay barn. We ran out of money in the end and stole money from a fountain to buy some bread/butter/milk/tayto to get us home. Slept rough in a school bike shed another night on way home too...chilly night...brokeback mountain style...ah those were the days my friend....

On second thoughts...
:)
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Hitchhiked to Newry back in 1969 just at the start of the troubles. Drank a lot of Tuborg Gold and got very sick. Then made our way down to Glengariff via Wexford .One of us booked a room in Whites of Wexford. When it was dark we all piled in to the one bedroom, washed ourselves and slept on the one bed. The guy who paid, loaded up with food from the breakfast and fed us all. Found a shop in Glengariff where you could collect a few "returnable" pennies on empty bottles. They used to store the empties out the back. At night we used to take them and then bring them back to the shop the next day and the next and the...
Some of the guys went over to Garnish island and helped themselves to a few pennies from the water feature. Those were definitely the days my friend and we though they would never end.....
 
This is an age where you need to let them go and do something with their friend's where they stay over night,But if you have any doubts then there might be a 6 sense trying to tell you something if not let him go.
Also if there is girls going ensure he brings a condom.There could be alcohol taken so this does heighten their sexual desires.
Even without alcohol teenagers together,boy and girls will do what is natural.
I would let him go.
 
Purple said:
... and that’s all that need to be said.
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True enough, but some might argue that he shouldn't be given any more opportunity than he already has.

I think, he has shown great maturity for telling Foxylady the truth I.E that there will be girls there. He doesn't seem to be have a need to hide things. He'll have a blast..oh to be young again.
 
DavyJones said:
True enough, but some might argue that he shouldn't be given any more opportunity than he already has.

I think, he has shown great maturity for telling Foxylady the truth I.E that there will be girls there. He doesn't seem to be have a need to hide things. He'll have a blast..oh to be young again.
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We have quite a good relationship , thank god where he can tell me anything and usually does. Dont know whether this is because I wasa young mammy or because i had the total opposite realtionship with my parents.
 
Probably both Foxy.

Also, if you are a young mammy you probably also have a heightened awareness of the possibility and variety of 'shenanigans' too since relatively speaking it maybe wasn't that long ago for you!
 
foxylady said:
We have quite a good relationship , thank god where he can tell me anything and usually does. Dont know whether this is because I wasa young mammy or because i had the total opposite realtionship with my parents.
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I would think its a bit of both, then again it may just be that the two of ye are sound people who get along together!

I definitely believe that a good relationship is worth a million doses of 'law and order' parenting.

I did not have a good relationship with my own parents, they were unnecessarily strict, and in fact put me into dangerous situations with their rules - which they refused to see (as an example, I had to be home at midnight up to age 18, but some friends and I used to go to local karaoke at age 17, and it ended just after midnight. I used to end up walking 2 miles home alone in the dark because I had to be home by midnight, the rest of them could all come home together in a group - much safer).

I did not rebel or become a trouble maker, I was more interested in education, but I always resented the lack of personal freedom and silly rules that one was not allowed question. It all made for a secretive relationship where I just kept things to myself rather than let them know what was going on because they may institute silly rules with no room for compromise.

Had they been a bit more open minded and open to compromise I would have had a better relationship with them. Your son is lucky.
 
truthseeker said:
I would think its a bit of both, then again it may just be that the two of ye are sound people who get along together!

I definitely believe that a good relationship is worth a million doses of 'law and order' parenting.

I did not have a good relationship with my own parents, they were unnecessarily strict, and in fact put me into dangerous situations with their rules - which they refused to see (as an example, I had to be home at midnight up to age 18, but some friends and I used to go to local karaoke at age 17, and it ended just after midnight. I used to end up walking 2 miles home alone in the dark because I had to be home by midnight, the rest of them could all come home together in a group - much safer).

I did not rebel or become a trouble maker, I was more interested in education, but I always resented the lack of personal freedom and silly rules that one was not allowed question. It all made for a secretive relationship where I just kept things to myself rather than let them know what was going on because they may institute silly rules with no room for compromise.

Had they been a bit more open minded and open to compromise I would have had a better relationship with them. Your son is lucky.
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Midnight, jaysus you were lucky. I could only stay out till 10.30 and that was on the weekend ( if i didnt have to babysit) when I was 17.
 
Caveat said:
Probably both Foxy.

Also, if you are a young mammy you probably also have a heightened awareness of the possibility and variety of 'shenanigans' too since relatively speaking it maybe wasn't that long ago for you!
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MAybe thats why I'm worried :D
 
foxylady said:
Midnight, jaysus you were lucky. I could only stay out till 10.30 and that was on the weekend ( if i didnt have to babysit) when I was 17.
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You know, on reflection I may stand corrected on that one - I believe it was in fact 11pm. Oh and that was definitely only on weekends!!
 
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